Am I dreaming?

Today, I walked into a coffee shop/bookstore and saw my book. Pinch me.

‘I try to be grateful for the abundance of the blessings that I have, for the journey that I’m on and to relish each day as a gift.’ James McGreevey

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It still feels so surreal, even though I knew it would be there, I was still surprised and in awe when I got there (thankfully I didn’t cry). The staff knew my name, they were all happy to see me and wanted to have a chat. Wow, what an overwhelming  feeling.

Daily I am sent emails from readers of gratitude (thank you with all my heart) and pictures of my book in your homes. Honestly, I can barely begin to describe how honoured I am.

‘There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.’ Nelson Mandela

Is this real? Sometimes I still feel like I am living in a fantasy world that all of these amazing wonderful things aren’t happening to me, or that I don’t deserve them (yes, thank you cognitive behaviour). But the truth is, I do. Without speaking from my ego, I have been tested, along every step of the way, and still every day. Tested to see if I really want this life, my dream reality. You just have to try. Let go of the ‘what if’s’ and just commit.

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The thing is, if you really want it, nothing can stop you. You have to ask yourself how much do you want it? Sometimes we think we want things, but we aren’t prepared to do the work or put in effort…I would say, whatever it is, its most likely something that doesn’t make your heart beat faster and light up your day.

‘Passion is energy. Feel the power that comes from focusing on what excites you.’ Oprah Winfrey

I wrote a book.

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Finding some time this weekend to have a little relax and reflection on the process this has been. Because regardless of what anyone has to say, if they like it, or if they don’t (yes there were mistakes/all fixed now), I wrote it from my heart. And absolutely everything in it are the processes and healthy practices that I strive to achieve and practice daily. These are the healthy habits that have got me to where I am today, and I even now I continue to do them every day.

‘It is just that we should be grateful, not only to those with whose views we may agree, but also to those who have expressed more superficial views; for these also contributed something, by developing before us the powers of thought.’ Aristotle

 

In the words of Arnie, you have to make a decision, it doesn’t matter if you make mistakes, don’t be afraid to make them, just make a decision and do it.

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‘The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mode but the true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she lovingly gives the passion that she shows. The beauty of a woman grows with the passing years.’ Audrey Hepburn

You will be rewarded I promise you. Rewarded in ways that money cannot buy.

Love & light, Charlie x.

Find what you love to do, and do it with love.

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Are you dating a man, or a boy?

So many of my girlfriends are confused about, you guessed it men (and my guy friends are confused about women).

“When you’re with the right person, it’s impossible to do anything wrong, and if you’re with the wrong person, no matter what you do, it won’t be right.” Unknown

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I thought I would spend some time researching the differences between a man and a boy. I mean what makes a man? We all presume strength, dependability, security but there is so much more. And it’s not to say anything against boys, it’s the natural progression of life, the way we act as girls or boys before we finally (hopefully one day) gain enough wisdom and maturity that we become men and women.

Firstly, a man knows what he wants. If you have dated these; ‘I just dont know what I want’ or ‘mr maybe’ guys, yup hes still in the boy phase. Perhaps influenced by his surroundings especially his ‘boy’ mates, he assumes a ‘whatever’ attitude. A man, he wont stop until he gets what he wants (this also includes you ladies).

Men look for substance in a woman, that of an equal or in no less a women in her own rights. Boys, they are into the hotties, the hot body, the clothes, the ‘HOT’. This gives them a stroke to their ego. True men don’t need this stroke, they are already happy with themselves.

‘Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.’ Tim Allen

A man has dreams, a career and is dedicated to achieving them, even if it means sacrifices. Perhaps messy nights out with the boys become nights spent working or relaxing. Boys love to party, in fact, note you will always come second to a boys boys.

‘Choose a wife rather by your ear than your eye.’ Thomas Fuller

A man will see you for everything you are and know if you are the one he wants to invest his time in. Boys are still undecided, because they don’t know what they want, and believe me ladies there is nothing you can do that will help him with this decision, it is developed with time (we spend so much time trying to change ourselves to make him commit, it just wont work). In fact, from the book think like a lady think like a man, steve maraboli says that until a man has made himself he wont be able to commit to you.

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A man opens doors. I don’t think this needs explaining. I recently went on a date and the car door was opened for me…brownie points to him, I was impressed. Men understand it is the little things that make us women happy, boys are to busy doing other things to begin to comprehend this.

‘I am a hopeless romantic and I love to spoil my girlfriends.’ Orlando Bloom

A man can have a conversation, even about the things he finds uncomfortable. Lets face it, the male species don’t like to discuss ‘feelings’ emotions and all the things us women do. A man however will have enough respect for you to listen and participate. A boy, well your lucky if you even get close to one of these types of conversations.

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Now this is not an attack, simply my musings of the dating world and the vast difference between men and boys.This is not even reflective of age. You can have the strength, dignity and integrity of a man at a younger age then what society would consider you to be a man. But being a man is about your actions. about being as good as your word.

Hopefully to shed some light to some of the beautiful women out there who are waiting for him to be ready, waiting for him to call. If I have learnt anything in my 30 years of dating, well 10, is that if he’s not calling you, he’s just not that into you.

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If a man wants you, he will call you. He will send you good morning and good night messages. He will make sure that he has asked for your time in advance. Simply saying, he will make an effort.

Boys play ‘mind’ games. Men dont. They simply want you or they dont.

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Love & light, Charlie x.

Now, that we’ve figured this out…where to find the men 😉

Sex, & why you should get more of it.

If you really needed a reason to get some more horizontal action…

‘Sex is a part of nature. I go along with nature.’ Marilyn Monroe

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I felt like writing something fun, yet the most interesting for us all. Sex, lust, love, it’s all good for you, and recent studies also show it makes you smarter! Sex is medicine.

“Sexually active people take fewer sick days,” Yvonne K. Fulbright, PhD a sexual health expert.

The reasons why you should get more/give more of it….

Sex makes us happy;

According to a study, people who have sex at least 2-3 x per month are 33% happier then those that dont. Strangely interesting, we are happier when we have more sex, but we are also happier when we think we are getting more sex then our friends (we are such a competitive species, in every aspect!?) In 2004, after analyzing survey data on 16,000 people, Dartmouth researchers studying the health benefits of sex found that increasing intercourse from once a month to once a week led to an increase in happiness equivalent to that generated by an additional $50,000 in income to the average American.

Sex makes us happy. Happy people are more productive.

Sex is exercise; sexercise/cardiovascular training (if your working hard enough 😉

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This one Im sure we all know…Sex is great to tone up nearly every muscle in the body. Researchers concluded, “Sexual activity may potentially be considered, at times, as a significant exercise.” Sex burns approximately 4-5 calories per minute (just don’t use any high calorie foods, whipped cream, body chocolate etc as foreplay 😉

30 minutes = 120-150 calories….if your putting in the effort.

A good way to workout I would say.

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‘Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.’ Woody Allen

Sex is a form of stress relief;

Human contact and closeness can ease feelings of anxiety and of loneliness. We each crave to be held and to be supported. sex is a way we feel connected. Sex releases hormones, in particular oxytocin which give us the urge to nurture, connect and bond. Oxytocin also promotes generosity. Time to give some sex & love.

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‘Sex is emotion in motion.’ Mae West

Anti-ageing (prevention is always better than cure)

Sex releases positive, feel good hormones throughout the body whilst also opening the blood network to deliver them, plus nutrients and oxygen to the cells. This includes the skin. When we have healthier cells at the basal layer, we will promote a healthier, radiant, youthful skin. In women, sex releases growth hormone.

Boosts your immune system;

Studies show that people who have more sex (avg of 1-2 x per week) have a higher level of immunoglobulin A (IgA), a protein that is responsible for fighting infection in the body.

Lowers risk of heart disease (although may cause heart-break);

‘Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there’s nothing exactly like it.’ W. C Fields

sex maintains your oestrogen and testosterone levels and keeps them in balance. All of the hormones that are released during sex promote healing and improved dilation of the capillaries (improved blood flow). In one study, men who had sex at least twice a week were half as likely to die of heart disease as men who had sex rarely.

Reduces prostate cancer risks;

Researchers at Nottingham University concluded that men who kept up a regular sex life in their 50s were at lower risk of developing prostate cancer (interesting, high sexual activity, more than 20 x per month in your 20s and 30s could increase the risk. Players be warned).

Enhance sleep;

After an orgasm your body releases the hormone Prolactin. This hormone is responsible or the feelings of relaxation and sleepiness.

Sex boosts Self Esteem;

‘Sex appeal is fifty percent what you’ve got and fifty percent what people think you’ve got.’ Sophia Loren

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The more you get, the more you want, the more attractive you feel. Interesting. One of the main reasons why we have sex is to boost our self esteem, good sex (wih love is even better) raises it, and we all need a self esteem boost every  now and then.

Sex can ease headaches (sorry but the ‘I have a headache’ excuse cant work anymore);

“Orgasm can block pain,” says Barry R. Komisaruk, PhD. during an orgasm the body release a hormone called ‘oxytocin’, amongst many other benefits, it is a powerful painkiller.

Sex can make you smarter;

Dr. Jens Forster at University of Amsterdam and Jacobs University Bremen found that people who merely thought about sex had better critical thinking skills than those who didn’t. Researchers at the University of Maryland have performed research (currently on  mice) that shows the increase of cognitive behaviour, memory and brain function when they were mating. these improvements declined when they stopped. (Note, I am highly against the cruelty of testing on animals) Sex promotes neurogenesis (production of new neurons in the brain), effectively increasing their brain power.

So, with all these amazing health benefits, its time to get your horizontal cardio happening. Sex is healthy, healthy is happy.

Love & light, Charlie x.

Envy or celebrate {others success}?

Do you find yourself envious of others success, or do you choose to celebrate their joys?

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I have found that sometimes it can be those that are closest to you that dont seem to share with you the same level of happiness in your successes as those who barely know you. Why is it that we can’t enjoy others success freely and instead try to belittle them or the way they have achieved their accomplishments?

‘It’s not people who resent successful people; it’s resentful people who resent successful people.’ Bo Bennett

As Im striving to continue working for myself doing what I love (this is my definition of success) I have fond that I am receiving recognition, support and congratulations from places and people I least expect it from, but perhaps not so much from the people I do (expectations we know only lead you to disappointment).

success3Are we that selfish that we cannot express happiness for people who work hard to follow their dreams?

‘It’s our nature: Human beings like success but they hate successful people.’ Carrot Top

When others believe that you have achieved the success they are yet to find, it can be difficult to swallow. After all we are all out there trying to the very best we can with what we have (or are you?).

‘When you’re around enormously successful people you realise their success isn’t an accident – it’s about work.’ Ryan Tedder

What determines who is successful and who is not?

“The world aint all sunshine and rainbows. Its a very  mean and nasty place, and I dont care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it, you me or nobody is going to hit as hard as life, but it aint about how hard you hit, its about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward.

Thats how winning is done.’ Rocky

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Its about how badly you want it.  You have to be prepared to do the work. When you achieve your version of success, you will understand me when I say, it is hard work. You have to keep going, for every 10 no’s there is 1 yes, for every minute there is hours worth of work to do. There are no days off. Work comes before partying. Your dream becomes your reality when you live and breathe it every moment of every day.

‘When you want to succeed as much as you want to breathe, then youll be successful’.  Eric Thomas

I used to gaze wistfully at successful people, people who I thought had it all. It LOOKS so easy. Now, I can tell you I look to those same successful people with full admiration and respect for I am fast learning the highs, the lows the sideway turns that it takes to get there.

There are some people in the world who just don’t like other people success. Resentment. Jealousy. Envy. This says more about them then it does you.

There are some people who are inspired by your success and admire you for dedication to your dream. Offer them a helping hand and keep these people close to you. Positivity breeds positivity.

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‘Successful people have a social responsibility to make the world a better place and not just take from it.’ Carrie Underwood

So be one of the ones that celebrates in others successes, you will feel better for it to. Celebrate, be motivated and share love.

The more you help others get what they want, the more ways what you want will come to you. This is true.

Success is hard work. Its saying I can in a world that will tell you you cant. Its believing in yourself when no one else does. Its getting up every time you fall. Its saying, I will not fail.

Love & light, Charlie x.

First, you just have to decide. Decide what you want, who you want to be, then do everything you can to be that person.

‘All successful people men and women are big dreamers. They imagine what their future could be, ideal in every respect, and then they work every day toward their distant vision, that goal or purpose.’ Brian Tracy

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Sharing love…

To show my sincere gratitude for all the support and love Ive been given with the release of my book, today I am giving away a copy of Live a life you love, a guide to living your life well. To practice the art of giving.

“It’s not how much we give but how much love we put into giving.” Mother Teresa

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To enter:

 

Simply repost the above image on your facebook (be sure to tag Charlie de Haas; Wellness Coach/Fitness Model) or Instagram page (#charliedehaas). Tag a friend you would like to win this and why they should win.

Simple!

 

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Sometimes we forget to let people know how much they mean to us, how inspiring they are to us and to really show our love. So share a little love and let them know you are thinking of them.

“We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give.” Winston S. Churchill

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Sometimes people can be scared to ask for help, sometimes we all get a little lost on our journeys and sometimes we all need a helping hand. Live a life you love, is a self help book that is filled with love, healthy habits and inspiration (also over 40 healthy recipes).

“Give yourself entirely to those around you. Be generous with your blessings. A kind gesture can reach a wound that only compassion can heal.” Steve Maraboli

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“For it is in giving that we receive.” St. Francis of Assisi

If you love someone, tell them. If you miss someone, call them. If someone is hurting, be there. If you need help, ask for it.

Humanity. Compassion. Love. Respect. This is what the world needs more of.

Love & light, Charlie x.

“Love only grows by sharing. You can only have more for yourself by giving it away to others.” Brian Tracy

Always practicing an attitude of gratitude. So deeply thankful for this very moment. To write, to offer my story, to share with you my personal struggles in this beautiful life. To share with you my belief that you can create the life you love, your dream reality, and you can make every day better than yesterday.

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Feel the Rain {& get wet}

Yesterday I cruised (biked) to the gym, happy that I made it when I wasnt really feeling like it (this is one of my tips, just go, when you get there youll get something done and you just may be surprised at how much). Then when I finished my intense leg session and it was time to go home…it was raining.

‘Some people feel the rain, others just get wet.’ Bob Marley

n6I contemplated the fact that I would get saturated, that my wicker basked would get wet (my cruiser is my new baby and I want her to stay in pristine/brand new condition for as long as possible), that the roads get more dangerous. I instead chose to think this was exactly what I was needing. Some mental clarity. Rain to wash away a few of the unwanted thoughts that have occurred of late; rain to create calm and restore peace. A gentle cleansing.

So I rode, just cruising, enjoying the rain. A few times I know I actually sung out loud along to my music (not the well known rain song, rather some old school rnb hip hop, I will always be true to my roots). I opened my eyes and my heart and enjoyed watching the individual rain drops fall, watching them drift towards me, individually. I felt the rain.

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And it was exactly what I needed. I just had to change my thinking. Instead of thinking something is ‘bad’, think of it as a ‘good’ thing. Everything happens for a reason, you just have to be prepared to accept it and alter your direction.

 

‘Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.’ Albert Einstein

 

 

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Nature, a true healer, a beautiful creation, a mother. Sometimes all we need is to get back to her. To spend a little time barefoot, to lay in the grass marvelling at the cloud creations, to feel the rain, to bask in the sunshine. Everything seems to fade away when you open your heart and connect, not only with nature, but yourself.

‘Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair.’ Khalil Gibran

I felt my heart refueled, I was truly in the moment, in the now. So much so I took the long way home and circled another block until I truly felt I had had my fill and satisfied my desire, my need for connection. A sense of calm.

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When was the last time you walked barefoot? Nature is a healer, whether it be the rain on your skin, the breeze through your hair or the earth beneath your feet; nature offers us an oppourntunity to be still. To actually appreciate our surroundings, the moment and listen to our inner selves. Pure magic.

‘He is richest who is content with the least, for content is the wealth of nature.’ Socrates

Sometimes all you need to do is simply sit outside, open your heart, open you eyes and experience how blessed we truly all are.

Love & light, Charlie x.

Saturated, satisfied & happy.

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Monday Motivation…Chontel Hau

That time of the week; Monday. As were starting to get back into the new year, trying to adjust to our schedules (I know I am, the 6.30am alarm is sounding shrill lately) I wanted to share with you a truly gorgeous soul who is as inspiration to many…

Chontel Hau of HIIT Station, Qld, Fitness Model & head over heals in love {newly engaged}.

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Charlie: You have created a fast growing business; HIIT station, and your own profile; Chontel Hau Muay Thai Fitness Model, in the fitness & health industry, what do you attribute this success to?

 

My strength comes from my fiance Sam Duncan, he convinced me to take on a PT Course, supported my decision to open HIIT Station & then jumped on board & has become an incredible Trainer & business partner.

‘The will to win, the desire to succeed, the urge to reach your full potential… these are the keys that will unlock the door to personal excellence.’ Confucius

 

Charlie: When did you decide to you wanted to be involved in the health industry?

I was interested when competing in Sculpting competitions & then after completing my first season I was hooked on the dream of making Fitness & Health my career.

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Charlie: When did you decide you wanted to work for yourself?

Straight away, HPC on the Gold Coast build the confidence in their students & educate them accordingly to be able to start their own empire.

‘Always do your best. What you plant now, you will harvest later.’ Og Mandino

Charlie: How do you feel as an inspirational figure/mentor?

At the beginning I was extremely shy, not sure how my friends would persevere the consistency of 100% Fitness & Health. I was confident in myself & my ability to help but was very shy to begin with. I now feel blessed to have the opportunity in life to share my passion in which is extremely rewarding.

Charlie: Has there been any challenges along your journey?

I think with any growth there comes it’s challenges, you just need to stay humble, positive & learn to enjoy the journey.

‘Learning is the beginning of wealth. Learning is the beginning of health. Learning is the beginning of spirituality. Searching and learning is where the miracle process all begins.’ Jim Rohn

 

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Charlie: How do you maintain balance between your Career and personal health?

Very easy I just train with my clients in the classes enjoying the journey alongside them, train weights with my friends during the day & share those workouts with my followers & regarding my nutrition I enjoy clean food which makes life alot easier.

Charlie: What do you believe are the keys to success in business?

Having true passion for what you do, that’ll keep you moving when you’ve only had 2hrs sleep, or an overload of paperwork or feeling rundown.

Charlie: What is your advice for anyone who has a dream?

Believe in yourself & don’t be afraid to fail.

Charlie: What can we look forward to next from you?

Growth! That is all I will say.

Charlie: Top 3 healthy tips/advice?

1. You need a realistic routine thats just as important as rest & work.

2. Professionally track your body with InBody Analysis Scans. (not scales)

3. Choose a style of training that you enjoy, because then you’ll be consistent & consistency is the key.

‘Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy.’ Norman Vincent Peale

 

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{I just had to share this gorgeous picture; this is life}

Charlie: Share something no one knows…

Not many people know that I represented Qld as a finalist in Miss Universe Australia, I wont consume sugar free products & I’m terrified of sky diving.

Follow Chontel:

Instagram; Chontel_hiitstation

{Go follow her IG account to win a shoutout, Chontel currently has 45k followers!}

Facebook; HIIT Station

Website

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The more I connect with successful, happy, like minded people, the more I realise that we all have it within us to become whatever we dream we can be…if we follow our passion and do the work.

Love & light, Charlie x.

Todays to do list; Blog…check.

‘If you don’t design your own life plan, chances are you’ll fall into someone else’s plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.’ Jim Rohn

 

 

Self Love Sunday…Dont worry {be happy}

Wow, what a whirlwind week. My book * Live a life you love was released (yes, I am well aware there were some unfortunate print mistakes, and incredibly disappointed, but this has been resolved), Ive been meeting, planning and organising big things for the next few months including new seminars and new collaborations. But, to be honest I’m finding myself a little worried about what my future holds. Am I in the right place, doing the right thing?

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‘Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow. It empties today of its strength.’ Corrie Ten Boom

I wanted to share this with you to be honest. My life isn’t perfect, I experience emotions just like you.

Firstly, the book, wasnt exactly as I desired it to be, but is still everything I wanted and more (if that makes sense). Ive worked hard to make this happen, now it has…what happens? Collaborations and possible business ventures are keeping me busy yet I cant seem to stop my mind from worrying about things that havent even happened yet.

 

‘It makes no sense to worry about things you have no control over because there’s nothing you can do about them, and why worry about things you do control? The activity of worrying keeps you immobilized.’ Wayne Dyer

Positive thinking leads to positive things; negative thinking leads to negative things. So how can we stop the negative when it occurs, because if your anything like me, something negative occurs and I can find myself dug into a hole of darkness with no light or way to get out.

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Over thinking, analysing, worrying. These all cause stress signals in our body, adrenalin and anxiety. We know that these practices arent good for our health yet they are so easily done. It is human nature to protect ourselves after all and this is why we can be prone to negative thinking before positive.

‘If you look into your own heart, and you find nothing wrong there, what is there to worry about? What is there to fear?’ Conficius

As my mind creates unneccessary stress (the, what happens now, what will I do, where do I go from here thoughts?), I find myself having a giggle. I am creating these problems in my mind. THEY HAVENT EVEN HAPPENED YET.

I believe it’s all about changing your perception. Yes, bad things happen to good people, they happen to us all. But its how you deal with situations that arise that determine your strength.

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As im tested I keep reminding myself these are just opportunities, tests to see how much I want success. How badly do I want to be a health coach, a motivator, an inspiration. I am prepared to do the hard work. I am prepared to let the world know Im not perfect, but I am trying. I am prepared to fail, and to get back up and keep going.

When you find your passion its like something else kicks in, your reserve drive. It gives you that little bit more oomph, that little bit more perseverance…more of the dedication that is required.

‘Don’t worry when you are not recognized, but strive to be worthy of recognition.’ Abraham Lincoln

So, my advice, if you are like me and creating your own problems in your mind, from things that havent even happened yet…make a plan.

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Todays Self love action is to make a plan…precisly, where do I want to go and what do I need to do to get there. If you have read my blog before you may have gathered I like to be in control, and organised. Self employment (at the beginning) doesnt really allow alot of either as you depend on other businesses/connections and clients. Im going to make a plan for what I can control…my actions; mine, not anyone elses.

‘If your happiness depends on what somebody else does, I guess you do have a problem.’ Richard Bach

Self love includes a sense of self dependence, being there for yourself; having that little thought that says ‘you can do it’, ‘keep trying’, ‘get back up’…this is the definition of self-love. Being your own best friend and cheerleading squad.

Believe me, you can do it. In a world that will tell you you can’t, go out there and prove them wrong. Stop creating problems where there are none. You never know what opportunity is coming for you, be ready.

Love & light, Charlie x.

In the words of my all time favourite movie…

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Confusion of the sex’s {men & women}

I have been experiencing so much love lately, from family and friends. We talk about our lives, our dreams our goals…and the most discussed topic; men & women.

“Don’t hate the player, change the game.” Think like a Man

Mostly ‘I just dont understand’ is the repeated statement. This is coming from both males and females I know. All of who are successful in their chosen fields, have their lives together and are truly gorgeous.

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We have become a society that doesn’t know how to communicate effectively, to ask for what we want, or express our thoughts, needs and wants. We make statements such as ‘theres no good guys/girls left’. Is this true? I dont think so, I believe that most of the time its no the other person confused, its actually us who are the confused ones, unsure of what we really want.

With the way technology is propelling us forward we are losing the human touch. Emotions cannot be expressed via text, email (unless of course you use an emoji) and we are quick to read between the lines, 1 x, 2 x’s or 3 xxx? What does that mean? 1= friendly, 2 = warm, 3 = definitely keen.

Im no professional but I do believe in love, and treating people with the respect you would like to be treated with. Be honest.

If you’re not into someone just say, if you want to be with someone just say. After all the moment we are living in is the now.

Express you thoughts being mindful of other people’s feelings. Most of the time if something is upsetting you or causing you drama the other person may not even be aware of.

‘Choose a wife rather by your ear than your eye.’ Thomas Fuller

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So why are we so confused? As women we seek to be understood, we are emotional, and we like to completely understand things. Men, like things to be easy (I cant say to much more as I dont know, Im here trying to figure it out myself).

Women seem to create problems by overthinking whilst men solve problems with clear-cut solution based thinking.

Men don’t have to like you to have sex with you, women may fall in love (thanks to the chemicals in our brain) after sex.

When it comes to status; ‘in a complicated relationship’, ‘open relationship’, ‘dating’, ‘exclusive’…do we decide these things together or are they just assumed? Do we have to have ‘the talk’ before we become exclusive or should we presume that seeing someone, is seeing just that one.

‘Smart women love smart men more than smart men love smart women.’ Natalie Portman

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Ive dated before and thought I had it SO right, that this was definitely going to be something, whilst turning into less than nothing. How does this happen? How could I get the signals so wrong? I do believe I treat people with respect and if Im seeing someone, Im only seeing that person. How do you know if the other is the same?

When we openly try to ‘talk’ (yes I know that word is a RUN signal for most men, we find it difficult to truly express our innermost feelings for fear of being judged, of being to needy or misinterpreted.

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‘Dont cry for a man whos left you, the next one may fall for your smile’ Mae West

If only we each knew how to decipher each other we would have better relationships and each be closer to finding ‘the one’.

Don’t choose the better guy.  Choose the guy that’s going to make you a better girl.” This means war

My belief; love yourself enough first so that when you are dating or seeing someone, its not to ‘fill’ or complete your life, more so to ‘enhance’ it.

Love & light, Charlie x.

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{You have to} Do the work.

So, I released my book, I’ve sold out, re-edited it (I am astonished at some of the little mistakes that got through over 10 rounds of editing & proffessional) and re-ordered more. I’ve been on cloud 9 (or 100 if there was such a thing), I have experienced the realization that I made my dream come true… now what???

{pre-order for next delivery here Buy Now Button}

‘Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.’ Harriet Tubman

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I’ve been working towards this for so long now, now it’s happened (still surreal, I wrote a book) where do I go from here?

Nothing ever gets easier and I have to continue to evaluate if self employment as a Health Coach, writer and speaker is viable.

The answer of course is YES. You just have to do the work. I can honestly say I havent worked as hard as I have the last few days for a very long time (my sleeping has been amazing, the complete exhaustion).

Now the book is a reality, its time to re-focus on another passion; public speaking (would you believe this was one of my greatest fears), and of course the second book.

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‘Determination gives you the resolve to keep going in spite of the roadblocks that lay before you.’ Dennis Waitley

I saw this post yesterday and felt it was perfect, in fact its going up on my goal/vision board. A daily reminder, you have to do the things you least like doing…for these are the things that will get you to where you want to be {for me looking for all the opportunities, asking for them, creating them}.

The below is reposted from Dan Waldschmidt;

You have to make the call you’re afraid to make.

You have to get up earlier than you want to get up.

You have to give more than you get in return right away.

You have to care more about others than they care about you.

You have to fight when you are already injured, bloody, and sore.

You have to feel unsure and insecure when playing if safe seems smarter.

You have to lead when no one else is following you yet.

You have to invest in yourself even though no one else is.

You have to look like a fool while you’re looking for answers you don’t have.

You have to grind out the details when it’s easier to shrug them off.

You have to deliver results when making excuses is an option.

You have to search for your own explanations even when you’re told to accept the “facts”.

You have to make mistakes and look like an idiot.

You have try and fail and try again.

‘I am not the richest, smartest or most talented person in the world, but I succeed because I keep going and going and going.’ Sylvester Stallone

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You have to run faster even though you’re out of breath.

You have to be kind to people who have been cruel to you.

You have to meet deadlines that are unreasonable and deliver results that are unparalleled.

You have to be accountable for your actions even when things go wrong.

You have to keep moving towards where you want to be no matter what’s in front of you.

You have to do the hard things.

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The things that no one else is doing. The things that scare you. The things that make you wonder how much longer you can hold on.

Those are the things that define you. Those are the things that make the difference between living a life of mediocrity or outrageous success.

The hard things are the easiest things to avoid.  To excuse away. To pretend like they don’t apply to you.

The simple truth about how ordinary people accomplish outrageous feats of success is that they do the hard things that smarter, wealthier, more qualified people don’t have the courage — or desperation — to do.

Do the hard things. You might be surprised at how amazing you really are.

‘Don’t listen to what anybody says except the people who encourage you. If it’s what you want to do and it’s within yourself, then keep going and try to do it for the rest of your life.’ Jake Gyllenhaal

 

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WOW. Yes, definitely going on my vision board as a daily ‘JUST DO IT” mantra. You see, I truly believe that you have it within you to be anything that you dream of becoming (and I have it within me), you just have to be prepared to do what you dont like doing, give up on some of the things you enjoy (for me, my passion for fashion is compromised at the moment) and FOCUS everything on your goal.

Love & Light, Charlie x.

Off to be productive 😉

‘There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.’ Nelson Mandela