Do women cheat on loyal men?

Yesterday I re blogged an article about why men cheat on loyal woman. I was asked why women cheat on loyal men or if it was a vice versa scenario. So I though I would share my story.

‘Women are made to be loved, not understood.’ Oscar Wilde

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If you have been following my journey to happiness and this place of contentment, this place of actually valuing my life, you may know that I was extremely unwell with depression, suicidal and on high doses
of antidepressants and Valium. During this time I was also a contributor to an extremely unhealthy relationship whilst also breaking up what could have been the best relationship  of my life. Confused? (I was to).

My story.
I met a man, the kind of guy you see and think to yourself, I’m going to marry him. He was everything I had every dreamed I had wanted, tall, dark, handsome and successful. He was charming, sweet, thoughtful…needless to say it only took me about a week to fall for him and lose all sense of myself (not that I really had much sense back then). I was completely head over heals, I thought this man was way out of my league so I did everything I possibly could to keep him.

‘I see when men love women. They give them but a little of their lives. But women when they love give everything.’ Oscar Wilde

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I was in love. Until one day within the first 3 months, as a regular occurrence I had stayed at his house. When he left to go to work one morning I did what any self-respecting (insert sarcastic emoticon here) women would do and yup, snooped. It was there in the bedside drawer on what I had claimed as my side there was the essence of another woman, her payslips, her personal items, jewellery and letters she had written to him (from her words and expression of despair, I have to presume that she went through exactly what I was bout to for the next few years).
I felt sick. That uncontrollable… shall I break everything, cry, scream, jump off the balcony, sense of out of control. Instead I went home, and went on a 3 day binge attack (because it’s so good for me to treat myself in such a disrespectful manner because of his actions).
Truth is, I had already known this. His walk in wardrobe was half full of female clothes, that he had claimed to be his sisters while she was away teaching yoga in Bali. (Strange how I was so blind to nod and accept this, I mean who doesn’t let they’re Sister store all her wardrobe, including her intimates, fully set up in their brothers walk in wardrobe when he has a 4 Bedroom house with 2 free rooms?)

‘So many people prefer to live in drama because it’s comfortable. It’s like someone staying in a bad marriage or relationship – it’s actually easier to stay because they know what to expect every day, versus leaving and not knowing what to expect.’ Ellen DeGeneres

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This was only the beginning if something that was one of those relationships that are just ‘bad’.
In one of our many breaks during the 5 years we were together (and the number of ‘other’ women and girlfriends I can’t even count on both hands), I met the man I needed in my life. The one who like yesterday’s post, wanted to be a man for me. He was loyal, kind and caring, he wasn’t perfect, no one is, but he was my best friend he actually cared for me, he loved me for everything that I was.
And all I did was hurt him. Every time my ‘bad’ ex would call with words of I love you, were meant to be together, I would go running back. Repeatedly.

I can hand on my heart say I never physically cheated as my ‘good’ ex claimed. However I was guilty of the I love you messages, the thoughts, it was not my body, but my heart that betrayed him, and me.

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Perhaps this doesn’t answer why women cheat on loyal men, but what I believe is that similar to yesterday, it is not a women who cheats, simply a girl who has not yet discovered who she is and is looking for a
Mans/boys attention to justify her presence. Without his words of ‘your beautiful’, she has not yet found a sense of what beauty really is, without his fake sense of support, she does not yet know how to support herself.
A girl is an addict to drama. A women looks for stability.
I have been honest in my journey to this place I call happiness. I wasn’t a nice person, I had no care for myself or anyone around me, I hurt the person who loved me the most. But mostly I hurt myself.

‘You don’t develop courage by being happy in your relationships everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity.’ Epicurus

Sometimes you have to go through the darkness to be able to appreciate the light.

It is from these times in my life that I am now grateful for every moment I live. Every moment that is ok, because I realise that life doesn’t have to be love and hate, it doesn’t have to be the high and the low (my bad relationship was flying, then sinking). It can be ok, and that’s ok. For even something as small as the opportunity to get up and exercise, to nourish myself with a green juice, to say a kind word to a stranger…these are the little things that are the highlights of my daily life that I appreciate. (I used to take all these things for granted). There is something to be thankful for in every day.

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‘Falling in love and having a relationship are two different things.’ Keanu Reeves

So, I don’t believe women cheat, no one with a sense of self-respect does. If you are in a relationship or
Situation that is ‘bad’ or condones Cheating, my simple suggestion is just get out. The longer you stay the more of your valuable time you are wasting. And time is the most priceless of all.

Love & light, Charlie x.

Please note these are my simple thoughts about my own life and those around me. I don’t claim to be right or wrong, nor judgemental and I am definitely no angel, however I have been in these situations. I am grateful for my past and the person I was because it gives me the opportunity to be better.

And that’s all I’m doing, every day trying to be better than who I was yesterday

Why all men cheat on loyal women.

I read this today on my morning walk and I thought to myself wow. I had to share.

Repost from Teremity.

 

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When I confessed to my EX’s questioning of my fidelity over a year ago, all she could say was “wow”. She seemed very taken aback by my answer. So today, when I was asked ‘why men cheat’ by a young lady during a Public Speaking event, I was initial hesitant to share the full conversation me and my EX had about her suspicion of my lack of loyalty.

“Can you tell me why all men cheat on loyal Women?” a curly haired PreMed student asked me today, during my public speak to a room full of 300 Women. My response to her question was,

“Males cheat on loyal women to boost their ego. A woman can be perfect for him. Beautiful, career minded, own money, cooks, does whatever he wants her to do in bed, loyal, intelligent, educated, faithful and yet, he will still cheat on her with an ugly, kangaroo looking girl every time. But why?

 

How a male treats a woman is NOT a reflection of HER worth. Nor is it a reflection on anything she LACKS or is not doing. An overly macho, mentally weak, sensitive-minded male knows he does not DESERVE a strong minded woman. In his mind, he thinks one day she will mentally awaken to the realization she deserves better than him & leave him. This is why males cheat on a woman, to have POWER over her. He cheats on her to boost his ego.

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Most “males” are more insecure than women. Notice I referred to a “male” and not a “man”, as there is a distinct difference. Many males have VERY low self esteem. You can tell, that’s why he says, “I only fuck with bad bitches”. He is saying this to convince himself, attempting to drown out his insecurities that are on repeat inside of his own mind.

By cheating on a good woman, it makes a weak minded male feel he has POWER over her. It makes him feel he is worth more than her. A male knows if he cheats on a loyal woman, she will care about him more. Yes, initially she will be shocked a man has the audacity to cheat on her, especially with an UGLY woman. No, not merely “physically” ugly, no. The word UGLY describes the particular amount of compassion, sweetness and being genuine and nurturing the woman he cheats with lacks.

A woman whose loyalty is taken for granted will question herself like:
“what is wrong with me?
Am I not I’m pretty enough?
Is my ass not curvy and fat enough for him?
Is my stomach not slim enough for him?
Is it because I won’t let him bring another girl in the bedroom with us?
Is it my smart mouth?
Is it that I’m always “over emotional” like he complains?
What aren’t I doing right?
Should I do more?”

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Then she will try to stay with him to PROVE to him she is better than the girl he cheated on her with. To prove to herself she can fight for love and can help him by help changing a bad boy into a good man, fooling herself. This is reverse psychology. A weak minded male just got a Good Woman to mentally submit herself to a mentally immature man, purely by cheating on her. Males use cheating to TRICK a good woman into SETTLING for him. But this mind game many males play cannot and will not work on a Loyal woman who knows her WORTH.

I learned as Men, we must realize that ONE woman who holds us down and stays by our side, after we cheat on her, lie to her, hurt her, use her and disrespect her over & over & over, she is NOT loyal. She is WEAK. She is poisonous. She will hold back your growth as a Man. Don’t be fooled & think a girl telling you what you want to hear is loyalty.

As a mentally mature Man, we need a Woman who will be genuine with us at all times, even if that means she speaks her mind to the point her words pierce us and her tone appears to be “smart mouthed”. In reality, she’s not being “smart mouthed’ she’s being a Queen mentality strong enough to verbally ascend to her thrown.

a Loyal, Strong Minded Woman will speak her mind, regardless of what anyone thinks. Tell us the TRUTH. Tell us when we are WRONG. A Loyal woman will not allow us to hurt her multiple times & still accept us. That is NOT loyalty. Not at all. That is Pacifying. Babying. Appeasing.

A Loyal Woman will be loyal to your MANHOOD, not loyal to your EGO. A Loyal Woman will tell us the TRUTH, even if that means she might LOSE us. A Loyal Woman will tell us when our shitstinks, even if it makes us mad. A mentally mature man does not want a YES woman. Trust me. We don’t want a girl who will LET us hurt you and abuse you over & over & still accept us back, simply because you keep being told through Instagram Memes that real love must be suffered through and fought for. If she still stays with us after we prove to her time and time again that we genuinely aren’t strong enough as a man to keep her consistently happy in a relationship, it means she doesn’t really care about us as a man. She only cares about how we make her feel sexually. She is dickdizzy.

When a Woman truly LOVES a man, she loves him at his BEST, not settling for his worst. She wants us to BE the MAN who we were destined to be by the Holy Spirit. A man who can speak life into a woman, erase her insecurities, and shower her with loyalty and consistence. A loyal woman will tell her man to get his lazy ass up, get a job & pursue his dreams. A Loyal Woman will not allow a man to live off her. A Loyal Woman will not baby a man by working a job herself, while he sits his lazy ass in her house all day, playing XBOX and eating Lucky Charms and Pop Tarts raw.

A Loyal Woman will not allow a man to talk down to her & disrespect her like she’s any girl, because she knows a mentally mature man DESERVES a Strong Minded Woman. A Loyal Woman will not allow a man to refer to her as a Bitch, Bad Bitch, Boss Bitch, My Bitch, Wifey Bitch, because she knows we deserve a Queen who has integrity.

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A Loyal Woman will not allow a male to FORCE her to get an abortion, or let him off the hook for abandoning her after getting her pregnant, because she knows we DESERVE to be a Father, not a Baby Daddy. A Loyal Woman will not tell a man what he wants to hear, she will feed him wisdom he NEEDS to hear and not be scared to do to it, because she is Loyal to his inner king, which is his spirit. A Loyal Woman will not allow a man to cheat on her over & over, leave her, then come crawling his cheating ass back after he had sex with every girl in the neighborhood, 11 of his followers on twitter, every girl who liked the pick of his “are you DTF or nah?” meme on his Instagram page. No, because she knows her worth.

Just as I speak to you women today, I speak life into young men as well, and I tell them to carry themselves as a KING, to hold their head high and never settle for a WEAK woman, when he deserves a Strong Queen like you young women. Yes, a WEAK Woman may always tell a man that he is right, yes she will let him use her, yes she will give him her money to pay his phone bill that is in his mother’s name, and she will give him her money without him even having to ask, but; she can never make him a better man and she can never love him like, a loyal woman can.

I made a huge mistake committing myself to a weak minded woman before, and that woman was my ex. Last year after I broke up with her, she asked me if I ever cheated on her, as she always suspected. I told her the truth and confessed, “I have never cheated on you or any woman, and I have never been unfaithful in any relationship.”

After my confession, all she could say was, “wow”, because it is commonly assumed all men cheat, yet this is completely false. I could agree all males cheat, at some point in their life, but a “Man” not a “male” but a man knows if he cheats, he would be not only cheating on a good woman, he would be cheating himself out of allowing a loyal woman to help mold him into a king.

Many people argue men cheat, because his woman will not do what his women on the side will, but he would never even consider the option of having women on the side if he deserved her in the first place. Some men are genuinely not ready for a relationship. To force one with him is only creating a relationship death wish. The idea that men are incapable of being monogamous is false.

I enjoy going on dates, flirting, courting and enjoy my single life, but in the back of my mind, I’m looking for a WIFE. I have ZERO interest in having side HOES or “fans”. I don’t need to have sex with every beautiful woman I meet to prove how much of a “man” I am. My loyalty, monogamy, spirituality & mental maturity proves that.

Each woman I meet, I’m looking to see if she is Wife Material. Because I know I am Husband material. My mother raised a future husband, not a hoe. I choose to be celibate while single, because my mother raised me to be a father and not a baby daddy. I live my life this way as proof that loyal men do indeed exist.

I have to admit, I am extremely picky and I know what a want in a woman. I want a woman who is as strong minded as me. I must admit I love a woman with a smart mouth who will speak her mind, yet knows that my masculinity and romantic aggression will always demand her respect, so she never verbally disrespects me. I love a woman who is spiritual. I love a woman who loves to shop & dress her ass of. It makes me want to spoil her with new heels every payday to keep her shoe game on point.

I enjoy the single life, but I have to admit, I miss having a girlfriend to SPOIL. To show off. To take shopping to the mall before our dinner date. Waiting an hour outside her house knowing she’s getting her hair right, eye lashes long, eye brows perfect, make-up on point just for me. I miss buying those Mani/Pedi gift cards that come in the cute lil box & surprising her with it to make sure my woman’s feet & nails stay on point.

I miss taking the SAME LOYAL WOMAN out every weekend, on spontaneous dates to the gun range, laser tag, in door bungee jumping, rock climbing, wine tasting, on a tropical cruise, snorkeling with dolphins or just to the beach for a walk on the sand after a I cook her lunch, fried chicken, bbq wings, potato salad, pesto pasta, fresh lemonade & peach cobbler I made just for us.

I miss having the SAME LOYAL WOMAN to cook for every day, to have in the kitchen teaching her to cook, then putting an ice cube down her back & laughing, play food fighting, then chasing her around my house
searching for her all around, only to find her laying in my bed, ready for me to trEAT her like food.

I miss making love to the SAME LOYAL WOMAN, texting the SAME GIRL all day, & never getting tired of hitting her with my hilarious vulgar humor and deep intellectual conversation. Being hilarious, making her laugh her ass off to the point her stomach hurts from how much I am making her laugh. I miss hearing the SAME VOICE every night before I go to sleep, hearing her cheese at the sound of my DEEP voice. I miss being a provider for the SAME LOYAL WOMAN, being her rock, someone she can tell all her problems to, vent to and then give her some sound advice, speaking life into my woman to make her feel better.

I miss giving those full body deep tissue massages after her long day. I miss having that ONE I can bring around my moms & sisters, to family events, so everyone knows she’s mine. I miss having that ONE to pray with, to cuddle up & read the bible with. I enjoy being Single, but honestly, I’d be willing to be loyal in a relationship if I found the ONE worth committing to. This is how mentally mature men feel. Yes all males may cheat, but a mentally mature man knows nothing can sharpen his iron and no one can mold him into a king other than a loyal woman.”

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After I finished speaking, the young women really humbled me, as so many of them personally thanked me for writing “Why the hell am I still dating Black Women.” I never intended that piece to become an article. I was just venting off an extremely disgusting experience I had at a barbershop.

I want all my young kings to know they deserve a loyal woman, not a fast girl. We as men need to do much better. Lets be the men we want our sisters to marry, the men we want our daughters one day to be wifed by. Being a good man really is not that hard young kings.

All a Loyal Woman really wants from us as a man is us our attention. That’s all. And that’s not asking a lot at all. Don’t make her feel crazy for wanting us to give her consistency. Don’t have her second guessing if it’s too early to for her to expect us to be loyal, caring and faithful to her. It’s not. Not at all.

If we like her, if we want to spend time with her in any way, she DESERVES our undivided attention. Not half of our attention on her, and half on every other girl on these social networks. My sister said a man doesn’t deserve her time if we are not willing to give her our consistent attention. You may think that is a lot to ask but remember, in order to posses a treasure, one must in return give up what the treasure is WORTH. Loyalty.

 

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I recently experienced some behaviour from a married man that just wasnt acceptable. I was shocked and in disbelief that this well respected, successful, good man (I had thought) thought it was appropriate to act in such a way.

Are you loyal, or do you cheat? Have you been cheated on? Are you in an open relationship?

I would love to hear your thoughts.

Love & light, Charlie x.

Yes, the married man was deleted and blocked, the appropriate behaviour.

Monday Motivation…Angie Gluten Free

Monday brings with it new opportunities. I have been finding myself to excited to sleep on a Sunday night, awaiting what my new day will bring. My focus today…I am productive. I will use my time effectively and efficiently {this includes some of my not so favourite…admin}

‘Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.’ Harriet Tubman

Sharing with you today the beautiful Angie Cowen of Angie Gluten free. A wholefoods chef and the co creator of the Wellness with Wholefoods, 28 day challenge.

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Charlie: You are an in demand Wholefoods Chef, the owner of Angie Gluten Free & Co-founder of the Wellness with Wholefoods program, what do you attribute this success to?

Angie: I attribute this success to my absolute commitment to what I’m creating. This is a full time adventure for me and every waking moment I’m dedicated to health, happiness and wellbeing of myself and others.

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Charlie: When did you decide to you wanted to be involved in the health industry?

Angie: In 2008 after being committed to yoga for many years I decided to change careers from the music industry into the world of health and wellbeing and completed my yoga teacher training. On returning from my training I took on the role of management for BodyMindLIfe yoga. Within 6 months I had up rooted my Sydney life and taken on the management of a resort an hour outside of Port Macquarie with my partner at the time and a group of amazing people wanting to set up a sustainable way of living. While there I took on the running of the restaurant and started catering for yoga and mediation retreats and everyday guests alike and quickly realised this was it – this was my calling. I realised that nourishing people was the most fulfilling thing I could do and the thing I could be of service to in the world.

Charlie: What inspired you to become an entrepreneur?

Honestly it’s not so much that I was inspired to become an entrepreneur although that is what I have become. My passion is in creating projects that I feel inspired by which will ultimately nourish another’s being and life. If my heart fills with excitement for something or if I feel something is needed in the world, I will create it.

‘No one has ever achieved anything from the smallest to the greatest unless the dream was dreamed was first.’ Laura Ingalls Wilder

 

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Charlie: How do you feel as an inspirational figure/mentor?

I see myself as an everyperson – I am someone who people can relate to and see themselves creating their own dreams as a reality through watching mine come to fruition. This makes me happy to see as this in in line with assisting in nourishing individuals on all levels.

Charlie: Has there been any challenges along your journey?

Absolutely, there is nothing like running your own business to be challenged and often too. My motto is always ‘its not what happens but how you deal with it’ which serves me well in times of challenge.

Charlie: How do you maintain balance between your Career and personal health?

This is the ultimate question, how do we create a thriving successful business and maintain our health and sense of wellbeing. Being a professional in the wellness industry it would be inauthentic for me not to be walking my talk so no matter what I eat a diet that suits my body and lifestyle, start my day with yoga (asana and meditation), get out in the bush for a fast walk as often as possible and love to break loose and dance whenever I can. Im committed to listening to my body’s needs and although have a really busy schedule, I try and 15-20 mins nap at least a couple of afternoons a week.

‘Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value.’ Albert Einstein

Charlie: What do you believe are the keys to success in business?

My 2 main keys to success are.

Honor your word – do what you say you are going to do for yourself and others

Be open and real – when things are getting messy be open to admit how things are really going in a powerful way and commit to creating a outcome that is best for everyone. A little honesty and humility goes a long way.

Charlie: What is your advice for anyone who has a dream?

If its something that makes your heart sing which can assist another in some way, go for it. Know that you will be faced with challenges as you and your business grow – this although hard sometimes is your growth and will be celebrated at some point. Trust yourself – this will be your strongest attribute. Trust yourself, your word, your creation, your process, your lessons. Trust yourself completely.

Charlie: What can we look forward to next from you?

I’m excited to say that the next Wellness Woman – panel discussion, breakfast and networking event is happening on April 29th and the topic is A successful wellness business and your health – Can we have both? This is a prevalent conversation and we have some amazing women sharing the stage and their hearts.

‘As long as I’m a good person and I do things from the heart, that’s all that matters.’ Gisele Bundchen

June will see a week long transformational retreat in Bowral with Life Coach Valerie Klagsbrun (hopewood) hosting life changing seminars, yoga teacher Romina Di Federico sharing the morning yoga and mediation classes and myself running cooking workshops and catering nourishing and delicious gluten free meals for all retreaters.

Stay tuned for another eookbook in time for winter.

Charlie: Top 3 healthy tips/advice?

Get a good nights sleep

Develop trust in yourself – its one of the healthiest things you can do. You will stress less and see all the good you create.

Fill your fridge with organic fresh food that nourishes YOU. Know how your week is looking and plan your meals so you are always nourished.

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The Wellness with Wholefoods 28 day challenge starts again on the 7th April.

Please email me charlie@charliedehaas.com.au for information about this life changing program.

Share this post & the Wellness with Wholefoods image on your facebook or instagram page #charliedehaas or @charliedehaas to enter to win a place in this 28 day challenge *open until Friday 28th.

I sincerely thank Angie for her time.

Follow Angie on her journey:

Love & light, Charlie x.
Going to make my day amazing.

Detox your relationships.

It seems to me we are limiting ourselves with the company we keep. Just like how we become what we eat, we are only as strong as those we surround ourself.

‘I think it’s important to get your surroundings as well as yourself into a positive state – meaning surround yourself with positive people, not the kind who are negative and jealous of everything you do.’ Heidi Klum

 

 

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Do you want love and support? Are you loving and supportive? Whatever it is that you need you must become. Take a moment and evaluate your circle. The people who are closest to you, who influence your choices and actions. Are they positive? Are they supportive? Do they care about your wellbeing? Are they understanding? Are they respectful? Do they guide you in the right direction? Do they have your best interests at heart?

I have found that allowing people to move through my life is one of the most difficult things to do. You see some people are only meant for a moment, some for a lifetime.

“7 things negative people will do to you. They will… 
1. Demean your value;
2. Destroy your image
3. Drive you crazily!
4. Dispose your dreams!
5. Discredit your imagination!
6. Deframe your abilities and
7. Disbelieve your opinions!

Stay away from negative people!” 

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If you have those toxic (negative, disrespectful, ‘take’ mentality) people in your life, how do you expect to reach your potential? Toxic people are toxic. To you. Your life.

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Detox immediately. You are the only one who has the power to make decisions in your life. You can wake up in the morning and choose to hit snooze or choose to get your body moving. You can choose to think it will be a beautiful day. You can choose what behaviours you accept. Every choice you make will create your life.

Make better choices. I used to carry a bucketload of guilt and sadness when I would distance myself from people.

“Someone who smiles too much with you can sometime frown too much with you at your back.” Michael Bassey Johnson

I would keep trying, giving people the benefit of the doubt, hoping and holding into thoughts of the goodness within is all. Truth is we are all on different life rhythms. Let go of those who are trying to hold you down, and let yourself be free. Just let go with love and light, wish them well and realise they were only for a moment. Let go with no guilt and surround yourself with the people who lift you higher (no guilt, it is a natural progression in life as we each change).

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Detox. Because people have the power to influence you, but only you have the power to decide and choose what you want and what is acceptable behaviour. Be strong. I can promise the more decisions you make to let go and move on from people who no longer have your best interests in their heart, the closer you are to finding the ones who do.

‘Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you’ll start having positive results.’ Willie Nelson

 

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I am so grateful for every person in my life, the good and the not so, in this moment and the previous. For you have all contributed to the person {& I finally love who} I have become today.

‘Good for the body is the work of the body, and good for the soul is the work of the soul, and good for either is the work of the other.’ Henry David Thoreau

Love & light, Charlie x.

Do you have toxic people in your life? Have you successfully detoxed? Are you happier?

To enter to win this gorgeous ‘NOTOX’ box, please write a comment about your experiences with people detoxing.

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Orthorexia…do you have it?

The fast growing disorder that is hidden as ‘healthy’

I have been one of ‘these’ people at many reoccurring instances.

The person who can’t eat this, can’t eat that, wont touch processed foods, only eats ‘clean’.

‘A risk-free life is far from being a healthy life.’ Deepak Chopra

 

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Orthorexia Nervousa; is a proposed eating disorder or mental disorder characterized by an extreme or excessive preoccupation with avoiding foods perceived to be unhealthful.

Perhaps you are one of these people or know of someone who suffers this. I have found this to be a rapidly increasing trend as we become more aware of the damage harmful chemicals and additives in food can cost our bodies, our minds, our lives. Also as aprt of the latest ‘lean’ fitspo image trend. People are choosing to eat ‘pure’ (good for them), organic, or healthy labelled foods. The food companies have noticed. Believe me when I say what you think is healthy can be just as…

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Monday Motivation…Jacqueline Evans {Jevan skincare}

Monday. A new day, with new opportunities.

Your thoughts create your world.

Todays Monday motivation feature is the gorgeous Jacqueline Evans who is a nutritionist, naturopath, researcher, whole food lover, educator and the creator of Jacqueline Evans organic skin care {wonder woman much?}.

‘Find something to celebrate each day’.

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Charlie: You are the Founder Jacqueline Evans skin care, a successful natural and organic range, what do you attribute this success to?

So many different factors Charlie. But ultimately I believe it is lots of hard work and having unwavering passion for what you do and what you stand for.

 

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Charlie: When did you decide to you wanted to be involved in the health industry?

After studying Chinese at university, I became very interested in Eastern Medicine. I then went onto to study naturopathy and suddenly everything I was learning at college connected with me; it just made sense. I have an absolute obsession with biochemistry and understanding how the body works. New research is confirming that the food we consume has the ability to ‘communicate’ to our genes, and this verifies that we are able modify certain lifestyle related illness with our food choices. That’s pretty powerful.  After years in the industry looking at food and nutrition, I became aware that the skin is our largest most permeable membrane and will absorb up to 60% of what is applied to it. I quickly looked at the ingredients in all my personal care products and was alarmed. Having a hormonal imbalance myself, but have a balanced diet, this seemed to be the missing part to the puzzle. I spent about 8 years developing the range (and growing the self belief) to launch the range, which is made entirely of natural and organic ingredients.

‘The thousand mysteries around us would not trouble but interest us, if only we had cheerful, healthy hearts.’ Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Charlie: What inspired you to create the range?

After years in the industry looking at food and nutrition, I became aware that the skin is our largest most permeable membrane and will absorb up to 60% of what is applied to it. I quickly looked at the ingredients in all my personal care products and was alarmed. Having a hormonal imbalance myself, but have a balanced diet, this seemed to be the missing part to the puzzle. I spent about 8 years developing the range (and growing the self belief) to launch the range, which is made entirely of natural and organic ingredients. It is our ongoing commitment that no harsh or detrimental ingredients are used. Finally, I wanted to do something different in a very cluttered and sometimes confusing industry; by keeping our range simple, honest and natural.

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Charlie: How do you feel as an inspirational figure/mentor?

Thank you. You know, I try to be an inspirational role model for my two daughters. They are my biggest students and also my biggest teachers.  They have taught me lessons like perspective and patience.  I want them to know that they can dream big and achieve anything that want.  I am encouraging them to have a healthy relationship with food and of body image.

‘All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them.’ Walt Disney

Charlie: Has there been any challenges along your journey?

Yes, I’ve been learning as I go that’s for sure.  Starting out, my biggest challenge believed in myself enough to take that leap of faith and quit my full time job and focus on building a skin care brand.  I now have a very small team of amazing people that help me, but starting out the isolation of working on my own was challenging.  I missed having someone next to me to bounce ideas around.  Looking back, this forced me to throw myself out there and network with like-minded souls in the industry and from that I have forged some incredible relationships

 

Charlie: How do you maintain balance between your Career and personal health?

This is such an important question. When you are running your own business, it is 24/7and all consuming, so making the time for yourself simply has to be a priority. For me it’s the little things, the little things that are achievable such as, stopping work and eating lunch at the table or outside with no distractions of the computer, not checking my phone until my work day officially begins, the occasional soak in the bath with some Rose & Vanilla Bath Salts, moving my body, and we have a strict no technology in the bedroom rule and I try very hard to get to bed around 10pm most nights. My non-negotiable is always choosing food to nourish my body.

My mantra for 2014 is to go SLOW.  I feel like I spent last year in fast-forward, and so this year I am desperately trying to live in the moment. Its not always easy or possible, but I am trying.

‘He who has health, has hope. And he who has hope, has everything.’ Benjamin Franklin

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Charlie: What do you believe are the keys to success in business?

Hard work, passion, self-belief, taking risks, listening and did I mention hard work!?!

My principles are very simple — source the best natural and certified organic ingredients, offer honest, expert advice and create incredible products to feed and nourish your skin.

 

Charlie: What is your advice for anyone who has a dream?

Own your dream, in every sense, then just do it!

‘Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.’ Harriet Tubman

 

Charlie: What can we look forward to next from you?

I’ve been listening to you all and am so excited to let you know that we will be launching two new Hand Creams in the coming months!!

Charlie: Top 3 healthy tips/advice? 

1.Take ownership of your health. Take the time to listen to your body and what it needs.

2. Hydrate. Drink more water and moisturise

3. Eat Well. You are what you eat.

I sincerely thank Jacqui for her time. Be sure to visit her website…

Jacqueline Evans

Facebook

Instagram: @jevansskincare

Because sharing is caring, Jacqui is giving away a moisturiser & scrub pack, valued at $88.00

Simply ‘go follow’ @jevanskincare on instagram, ‘like’ 2 pictures, follow @charliedehaas ‘like’ 2 pictures and hashtag charliedehaas {so I know you have entered}

Ends Friday 21st.

Love & light, Charlie x.

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Monday Motivation…you.

Good morning gorgeous being. Thank goodness its Monday, right? (YES!) The beginning of a new week, a new day, a time to just let yesterday, last week, and perhaps if you over indulged in the weekend (I did)…go.

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Just let it go. Start fresh today. A new day brings new opportunities, don’t even worry about tomorrow, just for today be healthier, be happier and make better choices. Every day matters.

‘Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.’ Thomas Jefferson

Today I’m dedicating my Monday motivation post to my new clients starting Be Well; the Project.

With your decision to change, to realise that you can become more of the gorgeous creation you already are, you have motivated me.

Recently I’ve been feeling like I needed a direction, a goal, a plan. As I’m trying to cultivate my own sense of self, for this is exactly what my journey is about, growing and developing whilst trying to build a business, and sharing my journey with you. I felt like I was beginning to drift, losing my own ssense of direction. I no longer compete as a fitness model, I had no training focus, Ive been feeling disconnected to my yoga practice & studio and instead I created my new business ‘Clean Treats {made with love} by Charlie…healthy, happy, no guilt treats that call my name as I work from my home office.

The world is not all sunshine and rainbows. As I try to develop and grow my business, their are upsets and disappointments.

You got a dream. You gotta protect it. People can’t do somethin’ themselves, they wanna tell you you can’t do it. If you want somethin’, go get it. Period. Pursuit of happiness.

 

 

 

 

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So whilst I promote living life in balance, I am a stress eater, I eat my emotions and when I’m a little concerned, stressed or under pressure…I eat to feel satiety and a sense of security. this is something I have always struggled with. Im a single girl, in the city, trying to make my dream my reality. I have no one to hold my hand or pat my back each night, hold me in their arms and tell me everything will be ok (I do use mediation and my own journal for this), no one to bounce business ideas off, and no coach to be accountable to.

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So I have come to the realisation that I havent been living my authentic truth. Or, I had in fact been living in a way that is self sabotaging. Because I am extremely blessed to have accomplished the things I have so far, but more so to do what I love, I realised it was and has been my own self limitations and poverty/limited success beliefs that have held me where I am. In my current situation, using food as a ‘guilt trip’.

Because I am creating my dream reality, doing things I never thought possible, I have created a ‘bad habit’ (to many clean treats & sugar addiction) as a way to limit myself, my body goals and also as a way to cultivate the sense og guilt I’m so used to living with. This feeling I used to get from holding onto that bad relationship, a belief system that I didnt deserve good in my life. Without that I have unconsciously created a new ‘guilt’/ bad habit that has me feeling ‘Im not good enough’ (too much healthy treats).

‘Limits, like fears are often just an illusion’ Michael Jordan

The truth is I am goo enough. You are good enough. Limits are only creations in our mind. Perhaps they stem from a belief system that is imprinted within us from an early age, but the truth is, anything you dream you can do, you can. You just have to believe. And you have to do the work.

‘If you not what your worth, you have to go out and get what your worth’ Rocky. 

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So as I have been unaccountable for my own actions, and feeling like I needed my own sense of direction, Im joining in on Be Well; the Project (most of the actions are my daily healthy habits, but I want to create a sense of accountability and responsibility). I am advancing my own project a little further (feel free to join me) 21 days gluten, dairy & refined sugar free, and I am incorporating the ancient Ayurvedic technique that is ‘oil pulling’.

Oil pulling for oral health and detoxification was introduced to the United states in the early 90’s by Dr. F. Karach. This technique is used to treat bacteria in the mouth. As the lipid/oil preferably unrefined coconut, or sesame seed oil is held in your mouth for 20 minutes, pulls bacteria from your mouth. Studies have shown increased dental strength, whitening, prevention of gum disease and cavities, and as a possible cure for bad breath.

Other possible benefits include headache and migraine relief, balance of hormones (perfect for me!), improved skin, reduction of pain, a hangover cure, insomnia relief, and supports normal kidney function.

How to do it: Use a tablespoon of preferably organic, unrefined coconut oil, sesame seed oil, sunflower oil or olive oil. Hold and swish in your mouth for 10-20 minutes before spitting it out, do not swallow (also spit the oil into a bag, not your sink as oils such as coconut will cause blockages).

Have you experienced Oil Pulling before? Please let me know I would love to hear your thoughts!

If you are interested in joining me on the 21 day {plus 1 week} intro, Be Well;the Project, it’s not to late, simply email me charlie@charliedehaas.com.au

You have the power to make this life free and beautiful.

Love & light, Charlie x.

Thank you to my beautiful clients who are my source of inspiration.

Are you free tomorrow night? 6pm at Real Food Connection in Camperdown, join me for some healthy treats, sip on coconut water and learn about all things health and wellness.

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A little update

Happy Friday lovers, there’s just something that feels different in the air on aFriday…people are happier, relaxed and generally nicer (obviously because the weekends coming! Personally it makes no difference to me). What if we could have this attitude everyday?

Anyway I just wanted to share a little love and update with what I have been working on, and what is coming up.

Firstly…my you tube Debut…

Click here for a giggle.

(I would love you to ‘like’, share or comment. Note I only accept love & kindness, nothing else will be accepted)

Be Well; the Project starts again on Monday…are you ready to create change? Email me for more info charlie@charliedehaas.com.au

Charlie’s program is full of awesome information that has helped me take positive steps towards a healthier, happier lifestyle. The way the program focuses on small steps at a time, helped me build up a healthy routine from first thing in the morning, until last thing at night. The helpful hints are simple things that I have never found before, yet are so easy to include in your day. Charlies approach, advice and attitude made me feel I had so much support, without judgment, during the whole program. Having Charlie there, and knowing she believed in me, gave me what I needed to be able to believe in myself.

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Clean Treats {made with love} by Charlie are now available in local cafes and to order for corporate, business, personal events (or just because you can have 1 or 2 daily without guilt).

Current options: Chocolate Nut, Vanilla Pecan, Cranberry nut bliss. Email me charlie@charliedehaas.com.au for info.

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Upcoming events…

Tomorrow 8am in rushcutters bay with the beautiful Lynsey Willenberg from Waters Edge Yoga. Yoga class and wellness seminar. Sip on coconut water and enjoy Clean Treats.

(Its not to late to book, email or call me 0412649 506)

 

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Tuesday 11th March, Live a life you love at Real Food Connection in Camperdown.

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Tuesday 18th March, 6.30pm…Love the skin your in. Learn about how what you eat really does become you.

 

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Of course, dont forget my book, Live a life you Love. An introduction to living the life of your dreams. Practice healthy habits and cultivate self love.

Buy Now Button

 

 

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As Im trying to build my brand, my business, I would love for you to share this post to your friends and family, loved ones.

Share on facebook (tag charlie de Haas: Wellness Coach/Fitness Model)

Instagram, tag charliedehaas

As gratitude I am giving away a People for Plants gift pack, valued at over $150  (Tag @peopleforplants)

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If you have any questions or would like more information about any of my services please do not hesitate to ask. Email charlie@charliedehaas.com.au, Phone 0412 649 506. I would love the opportunity to work with you, to collaborate on any projects or business ventures you have coming up, or just to connect and share some love.

Love & light, Charlie x.

 

 

 

 

The Perfect Match

We are told…anything you want, you can have. In the world of dating is this true? Is there a number/rating match that determines who should be with who?

consciously or not we find ourselves physically drawn to good looking people, obviously this is due to our pheromones, our sexual desire, but it also goes deeper within us as an integral need and desire for healthy, strong, beautiful children.

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Women are attracted to strong men. This creates the feeling of safety and protection. To feel feminine, we require a man who is masculine, dominant than ourselves.

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Men are drawn to kind, loving women, these characteristics provide the basics of creating a good home.

When it comes to physical attraction, is there a like attracts like system? For example, does a man who works out, with a 6 pack, takes his health seriously, find a girl that does the same attractive? Or is it better to be from separate worlds? Some research shows you should look for someone who does what you do.

If one person in the relationship is fitness/image orientated, is the other required to be also? Or are we ‘allowed’ as such to put on the baby love few kilos, you know at the beginning when all you do is eat, spend time in bed, eat, drink wine, spend time in bed…

Must you have the same interests, the same music tastes, the same ideals? What traits are ok to compromise, and what isnt? Would you rather be with someone rather than no one? (If the answer is yes here, perhaps you need to spend some time cultivating self love and learning to be ok in your own company).

‘When you stop trying to find the right man and start becoming the right woman, the right man will find his way to you.’ Cher

How can you find your perfect match? How alike can you be and how different can your interests be?

‘You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover’s arms can only come later when you’re sure they won’t laugh if you trip. ‘ Jonathan Carroll, “Outside the Dog Museum”

I remember a time when a friend of mine kept a ‘list’, in fact researching this post I’ve found this same advice numerous times. This list was composed of qualities that she wanted in a man, some article from some women’s magazine had advised to keep this list under your pillow at night (as if you could dream your perfect man into reality). Does this work?

Now, I do have to disagree with this as whilst I am one for creating lists (goals, to-do etc), Im unsure about creating a ‘perfect man/woman’ list. What happens if the person you meet fails to tick a box? Because they don’t pass the list 100% does that mean they aren’t worthy of investing your time?

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‘Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward together in the same direction.’ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry,Wind, Sand and Stars, 1939, translated from French by Lewis Galantière

What are we prepared to compromise in order to find our true loves? Are you prepare to look beyond your traditional type? (For me the typical, tall dark nad handsome makes my heart flutter 🙂

I know alot of women (myself included) who have the tendency to always go for the ‘bad;’ guy, you know the one with no respect, no care or appreciation of who you are, your time, or the things you do, and always end up getting hurt, therefore making statements like ‘i just want a nice guy’. When the ‘nice/good’ guy comes around, they either get bored or friend zone him and chase the guy that didn’t want them and treated them badly (because they are addicted to the drama, I speak from previous experience).

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‘Do I love you because you’re beautiful,
Or are you beautiful because I love you?
~Richard Rodgers and Oscar Hammerstein II, Cinderella

This is one fact I know for sure, that when you develop feelings and fall in love with someone, everything they do, everything they are is beautiful. Because you fall in love with who they are, their soul.

I would love to hear your thoughts, please comment or feel free to email me charlie@charliedehaas.com.au

Are you in a like/like relationship? Are you in an opposite/opposite relationship? Let me know, as a single girl in the city, following my dreams, the dating world intrigues me 🙂

Love & light, Charlie x.

{As for me, I do believe the appropriate quote is true}

‘Mr. Right’s coming, but he’s in Africa and he’s walking!’ Unknown Author

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The Skin Expert…Your skin.

Today I wanted to introduce you to the gorgeous creation that is your integumentary system; your skin.

All to often we take our skin for granted yet get upset when we get fine lines, acne, spots (especially on those special dates). We have high expectations of healthy, glowing radiant, perfect skin, yet what are you doing to enjoy this?

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The Integumentary system is the largest body in the organ, however it often doesn’t receive the nutrients it requires as the internal organs will take what they need first.

The skin has responsibilities such as touch, pain, temperature, absorption and excretion all of which play a detrimental part to our internal and physical health. It also protects us against that nasty stuff called bacteria and other foreign objects.

The skin will show you what is happening internally. In the true manner of Chinese face reading you can decipher what is happening in the body but also the mind {I offer this via Skype, please email me Charlie@charliedehaas.com.au} via skin reading.
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Your skin consists of 2 layers the dermis (inner, consists of 2 layers) and the epidermis (the outer layer), consists of 5 layers.

From the Epidermis Our skin cells turnover (desquamate) approx every 28-35 days, this process slows down as we age, as do all of our systems.

At the basal layer, we have happy healthy skin cells, juicy, fresh, radiant. They are fed nutrients and oxygen via the dermis (Melanin, the colour pigment in our skin is also found in the basal layer in Melanocytes). As the desquamation process occurs, these cells start to move upwards towards the outer layers of the skin and begin to die (you shed approximately 30,000+ cells every minute). The dont receive as much nourishment from the dermis as the capillary (blood/delivery system) network starts to diminish. As the cells reach the outer layer, they are dead.

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Throughout the epidermis changes occur to the skin cells, this is where pigmentation (can sometimes also be found deeper), acne, skin sensitivities and cell mutations (cancer).

It is imperative we do what we can to protect the integrity of the skin.

We can do this by nourishing from the inside, ensuring we have nutrient dense food in our diets to feed the skin, an also from the outside with delivery systems of effective products.

Skin cells require:

WATER…drink more of it.

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Essential fatty acids – promote normal skin cell function. The Rheins barrier (the skins protection system) lies in the top 2/3 layers of the epidermis…this is created by both water and oil lipids.

Vitamin A: promotes cell communication.

Vitamin C: promotes collagen production, anti ageing and skin vibrancy.

Vitamin E: Antioxidant to assist in the prevention of ageing.

Exercise: to promote the flow of nutrients to the cells.

Positive thinking: Your cells respond to the emotions and thought within your body, so send some love.

Interesting facts:

Your skin weighs approx 15% of your total body weight.

Over 50% of the dust in your home is dead skin cells. Keep it clean.

The skin is the finest on the eye area, approx 0.02 mm. This is why it is essential to use eye care products specifically designed for the finer skin.

Love the skin you’re in, Charlie x.

P.s check out my youtube debut here, I would love your feedback (please note I only tolerate positivity, love and kindness in my world) and if you would share my message.

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