The thief of all joy; Comparison

I am lucky enough to be reaping the rewards of my hard work in a few areas of my life.

I am finding that the popular quote ‘you can never beat a person who doesnt give up) is true.

I feel proud, excited and exuberant; everything I am working towards and for is coming true, my dreams were/are becoming my reality. Im so excited about some BIG things that I am visualising into my reality (opening events, scents, layout, design etc already planned), that theyre keeping me awake at night (then through the day I feel like I am day dreaming as I drive past ‘for lease’ signs). I feel this dream beating in my heart, running through my veins, already knowing it will become real.

Yet sometimes I find myself comparing my successes to what I think other people around me are achieving (thanks to the social media highlight reel).

‘Comparison is an act of violence against the self’. Iyanla Vanzant

How is this possible? Everything I had ever wanted in my life is unfolding before my eyes (still waiting on my tall, dark handsome Mr right ;), every day I receive news of something new and exciting that is happening, I wake up in the morning excited for what the day will bring.

Yet I still seem to self sabotage myself. It is as though my inner self doesn’t want to allow my happiness. Oh hello old self-liniting belief.

Why do we compare ourselves to others when we should be living our own lives to the best of our capabilities? Why are we so quick to look from the outside in and judge; their life must be better?

I know I’m not the only one who suffers this terrible habit, we all do it… (even if you claim you don’t); for example, the cyber stalking of your new guys or girls ex…to compare yourself and judge that person. Just last night as I couldnt sleep I (naughtily ) indulged in some SM stalking, before I knew it, I was in such a deep vortex of IG I didnt even know where I was. Id checked out someone in america, before being redirected to Melbourne and so on.

” Enjoy your own life without comparing that of another’. Marquis de Condorcet

We need to keep that inner negative voice quiet and enjoy the successes we make. We are all on our own journeys and everything that is meant for you will come to you at the right time.

‘What lies behind you and what lies in front of you, pales in comparison to what lies inside of you’. Ralph Waldo Emerson

Always keep an attitude of gratitude and stop the comparison. The intriguing thing about comparison is that generally you are comparing yourself to a version of a persons life  that they portray to the world (social media is brilliant at this, everyone’s life looks perfect), you have no real idea about what that persons difficulties are, where they have come from to get where they are or their life, you are comparing yourself to a perception. Nothing that is real. So stop now (note to myself).

As I am building my business, & hopefully soon I can warrant saying Empire; comparison is definitely becoming a regular occurrence in my mind. With the advance of selfies, facebook updates and letting the world know where & what your doing, its tough not to compare business growth, popularity and demand.

Especially when its just me. Im just here doing what I can with what I have.

I constantly have to remind myself that I am doing this for me. Im following my dream to create a healthy change in the world. Just as you should remind yourself, you are living your life for you.

Everybody’s version fo happiness is different. Do what makes you happy.

Because someone has a great body, a fancy car, or the perfect husband does not equal a life of happiness.

‘To love is to stop comparing’ Bernard Grasset

 

‘Dont compare your beggining to someone elses middle’ Jon Acuff

Beat your inner critic; Stop comparing:

Acknowledge comparison as a bad habit. Acknowledge when you do it, how often you do it, and reflect on whats going on in your life that’s making you feel less than successful. Perhaps theres an area that needs some attention.

Be true to yourself. Once you accept that you are different (and that difference is beautiful), you will be on the way to truly allowing yourself to be happy. Your life is yours. Everything that is in it or was, and is to be, is something you have created, whether good or bad, its YOURS.

Set your own goals. Are you comparing yourself to other people because they look successful? No doubt they have set their own personal goals, working towards their dream. Just as you should. Stop wasting your precious time and energy, consuming your mind with what other people are up to…focus that energy on your goals, your plan…what do you want to achieve? Write it down and make it happen.

So today, as busy as it has gotten, I’m going to remember that I am more than blessed to have created this. Busy is good. I am thankful.

At the end of the day, do what makes you feel right. I have purposely unfollowed and blocked any similar products on the market, because why do i need to know what they are up to? Of course theres a degree of market research, but honestly, trust your own instincts, follow your own brand beliefs and do what is in line with your business goals.

Love & light, Charlie x.

It is my life, my way. I get to make decisions, and mistakes…and for that I am grateful.

Give a gift of health & love this Christmas

Christmas is coming. FAST.

Seriously where does the time go? Its August, then Sept, then November (yes Ive purposely missed a month or 2 because thats how it feels) and all of a sudden we’ve got to plan holidays, presents, (for me birthday), New Years….

Today Im pretty {REALLY} excited to release my Christmas Love boxes.

PREORDER HERE

A gift you can give to truly show you care. I mean if you really love someone, and care about their health, their wellbeing…why are you giving them gifts like chocolate…chemically laden products, preservatives? Does this help their health? No. Their personal healthy, happy lifestyle goals? NO.

This year do something different.

Preorder a Christmas Love Box of #charliesballs and give them a gift of health, love and of course #yumminess {because everybody knows that #charliesballsarethebestballs / Consumer feedback}

Available in 4, 8, or 12 packs, preorder now for delivery 18-23 Dec.

Clean Treats is a preservative free range so its in our both our best interests that you give your loved one fresh #balls.

PREORDER HERE

Gluten free.

Dairy free.

Refined sugar free.

GUILT free.

Vegan (you can also request a PALEO box if required)

PREORDER HERE

Invest in the people you love bu giving them something that benefits their health, and Im sure you’ll both share a giggle over giving #charliesballs).

Personal trainers…Im especially looking at you.

Love & light, Charlie x.

Dont forget, if you prefer a #bag of balls you can also order HERE.

 

Self Love Sunday, my non negotiable date.

We are getting busy. This we all know. Its nearly an automatic response when people ask how we are? Answer; busy. Almost as if being busy is a sign of success. But when is your busyness…too much?

‘Find the love you seek, by first finding the love within yourself. Learn to rest in that place within you that is your true home.’ Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

 

Self Love Sunday. I will write about it & speak about it to anyone who will read/listen to me. I cannot begin to stress how important it is to just take a time out, for yourself.

You are the CEO of your life. A self love Sunday date with yourself is like taking a weekly meeting to review, analyse, gain clarity, organise and plan how to proceed with that dream chasing you’re doing.

‘You are very powerful, provided you know how powerful you are.’ Yogi Bhajan

Last week, I missed this (I was at the Fitness Expo all weekend with my #balls), and I could definitely tell I felt ‘off’ on Sunday night, but also through this week.

‘Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in one’s own sunshine.’ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Rest is as important as everything else you do. Sometimes we get so caught up in ‘destination success’ {we think we wont feel successful or happy until we attain certain goals}, that we forget to realise that most of the time were crazy busy…we are actually unproductive, and we miss the happiness that can be found in this very moment.

Have you ever found yourself creating a whirlwind of things to do, stress, drama? Yet nothing really seems to be done? This is being unproductive.

‘A loving person lives in a loving world. A hostile person lives in a hostile world. Everyone you meet is your mirror.’ Ken Keyes.

I know for myself, and I would recommend you try it, my date with myself is time for me to just chill, to check in with my core beliefs, my passion, my purpose. Without this downtime, I would be just racing towards my BIG dreams, feeling pressured and stressed, without realising & appreciating the beautiful journey that I am on, including those highs and lows {& there’s many of those, daily when your trying to create your own business and brand}.

You dont even have to do anything. In fact this is one of my favourite dates… I book in time to DO NOTHING. And honestly it feels as good as those big deals and accomplishments feel.

When was the last time you just did nothing?

Perhaps enjoyed a herbal tea {or wine} and just sat still? Sat underneath the stars and just star gazed?

This is my challenge to you…make a date with yourself, you; the CEO, the one who is responsible for all the decisions you make in your life, the one who gets to choose what type of life you will live, the one is the most important of all. Do something {or nothing} that you just love to do.

‘Plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
’ Veronica A. Shoffstall

This week I went art shopping, its been forever since I’ve picked up pencils and drawn, but I remember when I was younger this was actually one of my ‘self calm’ techniques (without realising it), drawing was my escape {I can actually draw more than a few squiggles, but painting, well…this is more stressful to me than a corporate meeting with the CEO of a massive food store}.

Just try it.

You are number 1 in your life. Your mental health is just (if not more) important than your physical health, yet we invest hrs every day working out our bodies. What are you doing to workout your mind?

Let me know how you go.

Love & light, Charlie x.

P.s whatever you do, DO NOT make this meeting and then cancel it. Would you do that in real life to your boss? Husband? It is a non negotiable.

Introducing, Fitness Pro… Chris Dufey

As you may be aware…I am addicted to sugar, of the natural kind; Fructose.

Fructose is still sugar. In high amounts this will create stress on your hormones, glycation in your organs and skin and make you insulin sensitive.

Not something I really want. Now, as much as I know and research, sometimes you just need someone to guide you and hold your hand. For this reason I put out a little SMS {save my soul, you have no idea how much this addiction was taking over me, leaving me feeling flat, overweight, puffy and depressed}. Chris Dufey answered. I couldnt believe my luck.

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection” Buddha

I have attended Chris’s seminars before and listened to his approach to a healthy lifestyle, and I was impressed. So, this week I started his 12 week program. Not just about the 5kgs I want to lose to be at my optimal health, but to balance my hormones.

This is how it goes; healthy eating/restricted calories/incorrect meal timing… over training, 3 hrs per day minimum. Get stressed, binge (on my healthy products) and then ‘punish’ myself in the gym. Balanced hormones? I think not. I also ‘binge’ eat when feeling emotional, stressed, and when things get ‘too good’ for me, also known as self sabotage.

Ability is what you’re capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it.  Lou Holtz

I am so excited to have his expert guidance, and once a week I will be sharing with you his healthy living tips so you to can create a healthy balance.

You want me to do something… tell me I can’t do it.  Maya Angelou

About Chris Dufey, The Fat Loss Pro:

110kgs, very overweight.
Shaped like a fridge.
Confidence is rock bottom, motivation is lackluster and getting through each day with not a lot of smiles.
Diet is poor, made up of junk, with the usual effort of trying to be better, that never leads to a slimmer, better body.
Training just leads to more frustration. There are no results being seen, and the mirror slaps back the bitter truth of his body.

Does any of this happen to you?

I hope not, but there is a happy side to this. This description is me, a few years ago.

I laugh so hard my stomach hurts when people say to me

“You’re so lucky to always be in shape, and have the right genetics”.

My bollocks I do. I don’t fall into bad habits because I know my body and health would take a quick turn backwards. I had to learn how to eat, train and live to get in great shape, stay in great shape, and then how to coach others to be in incredible shape.

The reason I feel so confident in being able to bring about results for you and others is not just because of the immense learning and education I put myself through. It’s because I have transformed myself along with many, many others.

You are unique, and need a different approach, tweak or variation to bring about the fat loss and body shaping you want. This is exactly why I made the two Online Physique Coaching levels so different, and the specific body changing products I make. It suits your wants, needs and goals. Giving you the amount of advice, and guidance that will actually work for you. Plus, fit the budget you have for transforming your body. It’s also the reason why I choose the coach for myself.

I know he has gone through it all before, is highly qualified and gives me exactly what I need. Everyone needs a coach and guidance. It goes for financial planning, business coaching even the dentist you choose.

My qualifications

• A.R.T Active Release Technique
• Functional Medicine University
• ISSN Sports Nutrition Specialist
• Poliquin PICP 1, 2, 3 & 4
• Poliquin BioSignature
• Poliquin BioSignature CE – Level 2
• Poliquin Fat Loss & Hypertrophy Intern
• P.I.M.S.T
• Precision Nutrition Coach
• Intern w. Francine Savard & Christian Maurice (World Class Physique Specialists)
• Fat Tool Therapist
• Sports Massage Therapist
• Cert. Diet & Nutrition
• Cert. Fat Loss Nutrition
• Cert. Sports Nutrition
• Body Building & Contest Preparation
• CHEK Holistic Lifestyle Coach
• Olympic Weight Lifting Coach
• Aus. Strength & Conditioning Coach
• Cert. Motivational Techniques
• Cert. Supplementation For Training & Performance
• Boxing & MMA Fitness Coach
• AIF Master Trainer
• Cert 3 & 4 in Fitness

---

You wouldn’t hire a broke financial advisor would you?

Then why still be unhappy with your body using a online personal trainer or doing it yourself that’s not getting you the results you want.

I am truly passionate on being able to transform the bodies of the people I work with, including you. And I am firmly against using many of the foolish methods and techniques that plague people wanting to get in shape.

I hope this has pepped you up and given hope. Because trust me, if I can go from a shockingly overweight, unhealthy dude, to a fitness model transforming bodies all over the world.

You sure as well can. And you can do for a bunch of reasons. One reason why you might want to listen to me is to get really hot, take a bunch of photos and post them on facebook.

Or to compete as a fitness model, win competitions, be asked for photos shoots with barely any clothes on to promote stuff.

It could even be so you attract a certain sexy someone, keep your husband or wife still drooling over you, never having to worry if their eyes will wonder.

{A a picture of health with his gorgeous wife & daughter}

If you are interested in taking his 12 week transformation with me be sure to check out chrisdufey.com {did I also mention he preps World #1 Fitness Model Andreia Brazier??? #enoughreasonalone}. Theres also lots of amazing podcasts with other fitness experts and ebooks to download, one I love is the fat loss smoothie. Enjoy!

If you want something you’ve never had you’ve got to do something youve never done.

Love & light, Charlie x.

The secret of getting ahead is getting started.  Mark Twain 

In saying that, please be aware I am on the cleanse stage of my program…detoxing from sugar, so please be patient with me if I’m a little less full of sunshine 😉 And Im a little unsure what to do with this extra time I now have… {just when I needed more hrs in the day to develop The Clean Treats Factory…perfect!}

 

Feature; Charlie de Haas, the fifty two woman project.

I was recently honoured to be featured on Debbie Spellman’s website as 1 of her fifty women features.

Debbie is a personal source of inspiration to me, and I remember when I first met her, I could literally feel the love and compassion radiating out of her. Our green smoothie date turned into a deep heartfelt 2 hr chat about all things life and love, and creating a change in the world. Since then Ive worked beside her at speaking events and enjoyed watching her personal journey and business grow and develop.

Im never one to say Im perfect, in fact Im incredibly far from it. Im learning, everyday, to embrace my perfect imperfections, because they are mine. So I wanted to share this feature, and a little about me.

Charlie de Haas is one phenomenal woman! Not only is she one of the most beautiful souls I have ever met, I have watched her take an idea and concept and turn it into a powerhouse. Her Clean Treats product and ‘Charlie’s Balls’ brand are taking Sydney by storm and her vision for her empire is so admirable! This is one feature you will want to read. I love Charlie’s approach to life and I am so excited to share her techniques on how she manages herself. Once again she has demonstrated the power of The Fifty Two Women Project by sharing her vulnerabilities which many of us just don’t see behind what we perceive as a very successful women. I hope this feature inspires you to realise we are all the same and it’s simply how we choose to show up that makes the difference in who we are and our life circumstances.

{yes, I did feel beautifully emotional reading such gorgeous words from a woman I highly respect & value}

You are such an inspiration for women in all you have achieved in your business. Was there a time when you didn’t feel so confident in what you were doing and why?

Yes, there are many occasions when I feel doubt or unsure. I think this is the pure beauty of life and business and things will always happen that will make you question yourself, your decisions, and your goals. What’s important is to create your own Self-love tools to provide the right answers and cultivate a sense of self trust.

If something rocks my world, perhaps something didn’t work out the way I wanted it to, I now know to revisit my core beliefs, why I’m doing what I am doing, and trust that what is right for me will be.

Was there a defining moment when you decided to launch your business or did this develop and evolve over time?

I have been involved in health and wellness for the past ten years, always working for other people and changing constantly, I was always looking for more.

I then had a dream of inspiring people, of creating change in the world and started to research ways I could do this on my own. I then took the risk (self-employment), put everything I had into it, and created a deep core belief that I could do anything, and did it.

Living our passion – even one which stems from our truest hearts desires – can be daunting. What has been the biggest obstacle you have had to overcome in your mindset in order to live the life of your dreams?

Some people may not know, but I am very open about it, I suffer depression and BPD. I have a core belief that I will never be good enough (something I am in the process of working on). These have definitely held me back at times, yet I am also thankful for them. We each have our own story to tell, our own trials and tribulations, and it’s when you can accept them, realize them and create healthy habits to overcome them, that’s when you can truly fall in love with yourself and your life. Because there will always be the good and the bad, you will always have strengths and weaknesses. It’s about self-acceptance.

Read more here

Read more here

Read more here

Debbie specialises in a technique know as The Mind Detox. Its about breaking free from those unhelpful core values and beliefs you have created somewhere in your life, to be able to realise your full potential and be the very best you can be.

Its about being your authentic self and realising that you are amazing, exactly as you are, and to stop holding yourself back.

I hope you enjoyed the feature.

Love & light, Charlie x.

Share love, be kind.

F45…have you tried the latest craze?

 

 

 

 

F45 the latest fitness trend.

Why? Because its fun, hard work and time efficient.

Exercise equals endorphins. Endorphins make you happy.

If you havent seen them, franchises are popping up all over Sydney to offer you FUNCTIONAL training. This means to get your body moving in a manner that is useful to your everyday life.

Get out of the gym and move your body.

Fit is not a destination, it is a way of life.

F45 is about high intensity workouts in (you guessed it) 45 minutes. Work up a sweat, make a difference and feel good without spending hours in the gym. You can choose to work as hard or as easy as you like, but be warned its a fairly (friendly) competitive environment (I saw you do those unassisted pullups…I can to!), which I think only helps motivate to push you further. Think about those hrs you spend at the gym, how many are actually working out? On your phone? Collection & returning weights (if your a good kid) or just general socialising?

“If it doesn’t challenge you it doesn’t change you.” – Fred Devito

 

{This is one of my gorgeous #charliesangels, she #eatsmyballs & trains at F45}

‘Run faster, eat better, sleep longer, try harder, aim higher, love more, day by day get happier.’

Sydney CBD {247 Pitt St} re having a VIP open class day tomorrow.

A ‘Hollywood’ themed circuit to tone & tighten, live DJ… AND #charliesballs (I love the fact I get to sponsor these brilliant events that promote health & happiness, a change in the world).

Contact Shane (02) 8006 8639 if you want to attend (I highly recommend it).

Love & light, Charlie x.

Create your lifestyle, your way.

 

The Dating Game {for her}

I recently wrote an article about the complexity of the game that is called dating.

The response I received proved I was not the only player playing without a rule book.

The Dating Game; For her…

{*Please note these are only my thoughts, not rules, and I am definitely not a professional dater}

Stop waiting for someone to ‘fix’ your life.

Is your life broken, perhaps not quite as you want it to be? We all go through the highs and lows that are called life, but its important that you look within yourself to ‘fix’ whatever it is you feel isnt quite right. You are the only one who can truly create change in your life. Sure, other people, love, may help, but these are only a temporary distraction from what is really going on within you.

Imagine how good it will feel when you create change in your life and you have yourself to thank for creating it (I can tell you, it is one of the most overwhelming emotions EVER).

‘Eventually all the pieces fall into place…until then, laugh at the confusion, live for the moment, and know that everything happens for a reason’. Carrie Bradshaw.

 

 

Love Yourself FIRST.

If you do not truly love yourself, how can you expect someone else to? Love your imperfections, these are your unique gifts. Love your attributes. Love the way you act, the way you speak…learn to love yourself. This is not coming from an egotistical point, but just be ok with who you are. Imagine looking in the mirror and instead of saying ‘I wish I was taller’, ‘gosh your fat’, ‘why cant I look like …{insert favourite models name here}; Imagine if you could start your day with positive self image thoughts; ‘looking good’, ‘Im feeling healthy today’, ‘I really love my hair/skin/eyes’ etc.

This is the best knowledge you will ever attain. You don’t need a certificate of attainment, for this will be written on your heart every day in the way you treat everything around you.

When you truly love yourself for everything that you are and everything that you are not you will give yourself that sense of security you may have always been looking for (I was, in all the wrong places). Good date, bad date, it wont matter because you will always have yourself.

Stop comparing yourself. You are precious; like a diamond.

“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.”  – Buddha

Ask for what you deserve.

The game is tricky and many people are serial daters (dating 1, 2, 3 or more people at the same time). When you start to know someone, if you enjoy their company and things are going well, don’t be afraid to ask for respect (basically exclusivity with no pressure). Do you respect your time? So should he. The heart is a sensitive muscle and it can easily be damaged. Respect is a minimum requirement when emotions get involved. And if he can’t/wont….he doesn’t deserve your time. Its ok to create your own standards for what you think is acceptable treatment/behaviour.

Show him how to treat you.

Do you value yourself, your life, your time? Life gets busy and it seems, well for me anyway, my whole life not just work is on a schedule (yes I am hoping to relax this). Men tend to be more blaze then women about plans (we all know this as fact), show him or tell him that it isn’t ok to attempt to organise dinners/sleepovers….that day (A woman has to be prepared!). I’m not advising that you start playing games, just remember, women plan, men, well, they don’t.

This also shows that you respect yourself and your commitments. Note to all the ladies out there; DO NOT CANCEL on pre arranged plans (with friends! We are all so guilty of this) because he calls last minute. It is not ok and your friends, you know those people who have been in your life for longer, will be upset.

‘A  loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge.’ Thomas Carlyle

Do not excuse bad behaviour.

Lies. Cheating. Abuse (physical or mental). Sabotage.

Is not ok.

Date the nice guy (and if you find one of these, let me know 😉 Nice, driven, motivated, kind, & replicates scenes from romcoms…up, its no wonder Im single).

Stop settling/better than nothing.

Don’t be the girl who NEEDs to be in a relationship. Have you ever asked yourself why? Why do you NEED to have someone in your life regardless of if you love them or not? Be happy on your own.

Don’t settle for less than you deserve, but also remember that no one is perfect. so, you don’t like his shoes or perhaps the way he does his hair…these are such minute details, do they even matter?

 

Get rid of your ‘list’. I once had a friend who had read a dating book which advised to write a list of attributes her perfect guy would have, then to keep it folded under her pillow and that then he would enter her life. Did it happen, no. Was every guy she ever met then on not good enough? Yes. Her list of attributes; generally; tall, dark, sexy smile, great body etc…only gave her high expectations that no normal guy could met.

“You cannot be lonely if you like the person you`re alone with.” Wayne Dyer

RELAX your ‘plan’.

The plan you dreamed of when you were a small girl (many dream of being married with children by a certain age) only puts pressure on yourself and the (poor) man you are dating. I personally had definitely thought I would be married by 30. Relax the plan, take it as it happens. Make it easy. Let it flow.

Have faith and trust that everything does happen for a reason. Perhaps you aren’t ready yet, perhaps you have some areas within yourself that need that love your willing to give away.

“Whatever you are doing, love yourself for doing it. Whatever you are feeling, love yourself for feeling it.”  Thaddeus Golas

When it happens, it will be worth it, and it will be so much better because you will be complimenting each others lives rather than living in need.

Love & Light, Charlie x.

‘Where there is love there is life’ Ghandi

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Successful; you already are.

All to often we run around creating chaos and ‘busyness’ in our lives; working hard, aiming higher, claiming that when we achieve ‘that’, get ‘that’ or do ‘this’, we will be happy.

But will we?

The answer of course is no. If you cannot learnt to be happy with all that you have now, how will you be happy with more?

Material things; that promotion, that house, $$$, do not guarantee happiness.

Yet we claim these as symbols of success.

‘Everyone chases after happiness, not noticing that happiness is at their heels’ Bertolt Brecht

We use our ‘busyness’ as a sign of success; the busier we are the more important/successful we think we are.

Success, derived from the Latin succedere, means ‘to go on well’. Surely this would imply that success is a journey?

We {myself included} wake up with thoughts of ‘just do it’, ‘you can have it all’, ‘make it happen’, now Im not saying these are not good thoughts, but what is your ‘it’? What is ‘it’ that you are striving for.

Is it material? Or is it to inspire? Is it to love more? Emotional/spiritual goals?

Happiness is not an ‘it’ and the more you chase it the more difficult it will become to achieve.

‘If your definition of success has little or no measure of love in it, get another definition’.

Tell me, if you were to go to sleep every night content and happy…is this success?

We often read bibliographies of great men, who upon their last words wished they had made more time for the things that mattered; their family, their wife…their loved ones. See, they’ve realised, just a little to late,  that love is what it is all about. At the end of the day. Everyday. It all comes down to love.

‘The intelligent man quickly realize the importance of gold’ Hafiz

What is really important to you?

If love is important, how can you have more love in your life today?

If happiness is important, how can you be happier today?

If health is important, how can you be healthier today?

{I just adore this, who will swim in the rain with me?}

Be present now. Whilst yes, I am a dreamer and I have BIG plans, when I find myself daydreaming {this includes interior designing & launch party invite creations} I have to make a conscious effort to return to the moment, to today. Because if I don’t, If I spend my time to far in the clouds, to far in the ‘when I’ thoughts, the things that actually need to be done to make this dream come true, wont be.

Do you do what you love everyday?

Do you smile with someone everyday?

Do you exercise, eat healthy everyday?

These are moments of success.

‘Dont aim for success if you want it; just do what you love and believe in, and it will come naturally.’ David Frost.

{I am so blessed to receive such kind words like the above, truly makes my heart smile, and keeps me going when those not so great things happen, as they do in business, love, life.}

It is a proven fact that happier people are more productive. So saying something like ‘I am happy with my work’ will generate a positive outcome. Saying something like’ I hate work’ wont.

If today you can just be a little better than yesterday, your already on your way to creating your own dream reality.

‘Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm. Winston Churchill.

Even the above quote states that success is to keep going. If you ask me about business, happiness or love {not that I know a whole lot, I make mistakes everyday, but I am trying}, my words to you, to anyone would be to find what makes you happy, believe in yourself and never quit.

Just keep going.

Love & light, Charlie x.

Love right now. No matter where you are in your life, or what is happening, you are exactly where you should be & everything will always be ok.

Monday Motivation…Sali Stevanja {Stylerunner}

Last night I was reading Napoleon Hill; the necessary steps to success are:

3. A mind closed tightly against all negative and discouraging influences. 4. A Friendly alliance with one or more persons who will encourage one to follow through with both plan and purpose. As I thought about these words I began to think about the world I live in & the people in it.

I have made no secret of the fact that I love the deep meaningful conversations about passion and purpose, meeting and talking with people with their own souls alight as they talk about their own pursuit of happiness, or what they are doing to create a change in the world. I was pleasantly astounded when I realised that most of the people who I connect with as I change my own life, are entrepreneurs, or working for themselves, following their own passion and creating their…

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Happy all the time?

Just yesterday I was asked if I was genuinely happy ALL the time.

I thought it was a simple question to deeply contemplate.

 

The answer of course is no. No, I am not happy all the time. Whilst most of the time I do believe Im living in a different world (choosing to see positive, opportunities and beauty), I still hurt. A cruel word or action can definitely pop my bubble and bring me back down to earth, wondering where did I go wrong? Whats wrong with me…why cant I just seem to ‘make’ it, why will nobody love me?

{oh hello self doubt, self sabotage thoughts}.

 

The thing that I have found with happiness, is you must stop searching for it. Stop thinking; ‘When I get married’, ‘when I have a family’, ‘When I achieve my business goal turnover’… {you probably have your own ‘when I do this, then Ill be happy’}.

‘It is not how much we have, but how much we enjoy, that makes happiness.’ Charles Spurgeon

The fact is happiness is yours right now, if you choose to see it, to feel it, and believe it.

Happiness is in the fact that you woke up this morning. For me, I woke up and exercised…happiness. I chose a clean egg white omelette with my espresso whilst I write this…happiness.

Happiness is the small moments that create our life. It is not, and will not ‘appear’ when you achieve your goals, in fact it will most likely remain just out of your grasp. Elusive.

We think happiness is something that means all our problems will dissappear…I promise you they wont. Everyday I genuinely feel a sense of contentment, passion and purpose course through my veins, but all day everyday…no. Its more a general state of wellbeing, of keeping a positive mind, of knowing that life will happen, challenges will arise, people will hurt you, {intentionally or not}…but everything willalways be ok.

Happiness; you can cultivate it. With an attitude of gratitude.

I BELIEVE THIS WITH ALL OF MY BEING. 

Stop right now, sit comfortably, focus on breathing deeply and create a thought of gratitude. What are you thankful for? It doesn’t have to be something huge, it can be something as simple as I am grateful for my health.’ ‘I am grateful I have a career, work to go to’, ‘I am grateful I woke up this morning.’

‘Be happy with what you have and are, be generous with both, and you wont have to hunt for happiness.’ William E. Gladstone

So simple. What we focus on grows.

I absolutely adore reading and whilst some self-help books are merely thoughts that cannot be applied into daily living, some contain powerful tools that teach you to challenge your thought process, which is naturally prone to negative thinking/self protection.

When I am feeling less than happy, {and that’s perfectly ok to, be at peace with your emotions} I use some of my own personal SOS {really should be Save my Soul, SMS} tools.

‘I am determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may find myself. For I have learned that the greater part of our misery or unhappiness is determined not by pur circumstance but by our disposition.’ Martha Washington

1. Sit & just breathe.

Notice where and how you are breathing in times of distress; short and shallow. Just take a moment be still and breathe in for the count of 4, retain and then release for the same count, retain. Repeat x 10. There is no better magic cure for your body, your mind and your whole Central nervous system then to breathe deeply.

2. Make a phonecall to someone who makes me feel good.

This is what friends and family are for. Sadness, depression, anxiety, anger or upset are not signs of weakness, don’t be afraid to reach out to someone for a little love. I sometimes send out a little love note to my friends, the people I truly care about…by giving love, I get love (their replies).

3. Take a break from Social Media.

I’m sure you feel me on this one…there is nothing that can bring you down faster than social media ‘stalking’, ‘research; whatever you prefer to call it. All of a sudden I find myself on the guy I’m crushing’s ex girlfriends page from 3 years ago, reading comments and deciding that they must still be in love? Hmm, not quite sure that is productive for me or a potential relationship. Or, I find myself seeing numerous new ‘competitors’, or businesses of a similar nature to mine, people who I thought were friends/acquaintances to some level, using the EXACT same ingredients in their product?! Does this create a good feeling? No.

4. Listen to my self love song {on repeat} Mariah Carey; Hero. Eva Cassidy; Time after time, or True Colours.

#nojudgement.

But if we talk to ourselves at a rate of 50 words per minute, 3000 per hr (Excerpt Authentic Success)…why not get some self love, strong, inspiring words?

‘Theres a hero, if you look inside your heart, you don’t have to be afraid of what you are.

Theres an answer, if you reach into your soul and the sorrow that you know will melt away.

And then a hero comes along with the strength to carry on, and you cast your fears aside and you know you can survive, so when you feel like hope is gone, look inside you and be strong and you’ll finally see the truth that a hero lies in you. 

{oh yes, love, love. And believe me when I say, Ive listened to this more times than I can remember and even reading the words creates a warm feeling in my heart}

5. Just go to the gym.

Exercise creates endorphins, your internal feel good drugs. I know sometimes I just dont feel like going…it can take me an hr to get there after pro level procrastination, but when I’m there… happiness, or just a general sense of feeling good.

6. Do something business wise I don’t really want to do.

I know the sense of achievement will boost my spirits and Ill feel a sense of pride in being able to do the work I may not want to do.

7. Write.

I still keep a journal of my inner most thoughts, including the things I have written about my dark days, the days when Ive felt on top of the world, and some  of the things I have wanted to express to people who have hurt me. Writing is expression.

8. Just go to bed.

Now the difference is learning when you really need this; rest {I suffered depression and spent days being unable to get out}, or when you are just trying to escape something.

‘Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.’ Dalai Lama

These are some of my little ‘Help me’ tools. Find what works for you. The ocean, running, surfing…create your own ‘happiness cultivation tools’ and have them on speed dial.

So, no I’m not happy all the time, but I am ok. I know that life will have its highs and its lows. I know that some people will love me, and some wont even bother to reply to a text message…and this is ok. I know that Ill have friends forever, and some for a short time. I know that in business, I will make mistakes and I will kick goals. This is all ok.

 

And its all good, because I’ve got my own back {and I know the universe does}.

Love & light, Charlie x.

‘Lord knows that dreams are hard to follow, but dont let anyone tear them away’